Women & The Death of Femininity

Women & The Death of Femininity

Hardened men make for attractive men, for toughness is a trait that men and women alike covet in men. Almost all respect a hardened man even when they dislike him. At the same time, hardened women make for utterly repulsive beings. They do not inspire desire nor respect, merely alienation. Hardening is conducive to the cultivation of masculinity, but to femininity it is toxic. To femininity it is harmful, deleterious. Women must seek wisdom and respite in the face of suffering, not masculination. For women to preserve their greatest asset: their femininity, they must avoid masculinisation at all costs. This is healthier and more conducive to a woman’s development than adopting masculine boisterousness.

Women are taught to debauch their femininity in pursuit of power and social acceptance under the rule of feminist dogma. They all too unwittingly realise not what they give up by capitulating to feminism. Much to woman’s detriment, adhering to the feminist roadmap results in a vitiation of her desirability to the kind of man she yearns for. Of specific note in regard to this is the contemporary culture. The current economic model and prevailing social-programming of the time push women towards masculinity by framing it as “liberation.” Feminism sells women the lie that to masculinise is to become free. It convinces the feminine to divorce herself from her nature and to aspire to be that which she isn’t. That her desire to nurture, support and mother is weak. She should become more manlike, fierce, assertive, a conqueror! Indeed what banal trite, there is no man of worth breathing that wants to commit to the fabled feminist “real woman.”

As such, the typical woman aims to emulate the qualities of men rather than master the art of femininity. These women have been contorted in belief to reject traditional femininity as abhorrent, weak. They delusively idolise emulating the behaviour of man whilst ironically harbouring a hatred for man. They idolise such behaviour because they have been taught it is necessary to acquire success and respect. They could not be any more wrong. Nothing raises the ire and disdain of man more than a woman who attempts to make him obsolete by emulating him. Men desire not masculine women, neither do they wish to compete with them. Men desire feminine women, they want to take care of them. Men of substantial worth reject women devoid of femininity.

Women have two distinct choices, the prior I believe leading to richer, longer-lasting happiness and the latter, not so. They may refine their femininity and cultivate that quality to captivate the love of a powerful man. Said man will provide the bulk of the income. Work will be relegated to the realm of hobby, coming not before family, keeping house and child-rearing. The latter is that of the career woman, of independence. This is the ethos that has led to the collective masculinisation, stress and misery of today’s women. They forgo the refinement of femininity to work in the world of business. To be competitive in such an environment they toughen up to survive, reducing their social appeal.

Toughness (distinct from resilience) reduces a woman’s femininity, thus mitigating her desirability to men. A resilient woman can maintain her femininity and draw upon feminine strength without masculinising. Resilient women continue to build upon and maximise their femininity in spite of hardship. They do not give in to the corruptive allure of masculinisation and poison themselves with a lust for conquest. They expend their efforts on becoming personable, wise and altruistic. They look for shelter in friendship and compassion, rather than sacrifice their femininity on the altar of feminism. They enhance rather than contort themselves. They do not entertain bitterness and allow hatred to warp them into pathetic vaginal caricatures of masculinity. They embrace traditional femininity for the value it holds to men and the rewards that yields. They do not adopt the contemptuous inferiority complex symptomatic of feminism. They do not chain themselves to the views of “friends” who condemn them for aspiring to be traditionally feminine.

Those who undergo pain often become tougher of heart as a coping mechanism. With toughness comes a certain masculine component. The more damaged and pain afflicted a person becomes, the more they harden and toughen. This hardening is a natural response to ineptitude, dysfunction and disappointment. Hardening is necessary for masculine self-improvement because men are charged with leadership. Men cannot be attractive and fulfilled in their relationship unless they lead, women can. Men can have it all, they can become harder and likewise more desirable in their masculinity.

This could even go so far to explain why in the psychological sense women have a propensity to value the ruggedness that experience brings in men. While men on the other hand tend to prefer innocence and inexperience in women – defining this as not only as seductive but psychologically desirable. The why is simple: such a woman is free of the contamination of bitterness and cynicism that the failures of experience would wrought upon such a woman. These psychological aspects are the predominant culprits responsible for spoiling a woman’s femininity. There is little feminine that can remain feminine in the presence of distrustful cynicism and vitriolic bitterness. Such women find themselves unloved, condemned to loneliness for they reek of repugnant undesirability.

In essence the more worn and experienced a woman becomes, the less feminine she becomes. Whilst a more battle-scarred and experienced man becomes more masculine. This is symptomatic of toughness, for toughness is a masculinising procedure. It is thus I must make an observation: it does indeed appear that men become more masculine with time and sufficient hardship. Antithetically, women, less feminine. Therefore it stands to reason that toughness is conducive to masculinity whilst detrimental to femininity. It is in my estimation that men not only prefer young women for their more nubile bodies, but additionally, for their more innocent – and so feminine – disposition. This perhaps goes some way in explaining the feminine obsession with maturity, for mature woman are (physically) oft perceived less desirable than the immature. Diametrically an immature man is of markedly lower desirability than a mature one. What’s good for one is not good for the other. It seems to be the nature of gender and biology itself to impose different measures of desirability upon men and women. Without these differences, there cannot be union. Yin-yang is necessary to maintain the balance needed for love to flourish. Women being yin, men being yang. When we try to reverse yin and yang so that women become masculine and men, feminine – monogamous love fails to flourish. Indeed it seems the position of yin and yang within the gender duality are static impositions.

This leads to my next point of estimation, I do believe that the fundamental reason the societies of the world have always tried so hard to protect and provide for their women in a manner of care that is all but absent in nature to their respective men is due to something of a matter of instinct which seeks to preserve the spiritual femininity of women, with an inherent understanding that the failure to protect women from the world and its evil would lead to the masculinisation of their disposition and thus rather tragically, the irrevocable loss of their femininity, for not enough new girls can be born and protected sufficiently from their older counterparts to replace the entire female demographic with women of femininity. It would seem that societies on some fundamental level have realised, perhaps not always in a way that they are conscious and eloquent enough to articulate, that femininity in and of itself carries a certain intrinsic value that is necessary for the sustenance and self-preservation of a society, and it is this value that is to be protected and sustained. These societies realised that subjecting women to the same kind of pressures that men are subject to would cause them to lose their femininity along the way, and such women would better benefit society by retaining their femininity rather than sacrificing it out of necessity in the emulation of man. For if society should forfeit femininity, demanding women fend for and coarsen themselves with the ugliness of survival, the very society reliant upon those who would maintain it would feel the tremors of emancipation as the feminine spirit is forcefully eviscerated from the societal psyche, leaving nothing but a collection of beings who strive to be manlike in its wake.

Without the counterbalance of gentle and demure femininity to complement the assertiveness of traditional masculinity, any affected society would foster detached apathy through competition within its citizenry rather than inclusive empathy through community.

Femininity is not just a gift to women, free of the shackles of responsibility that define manhood and the accompanying economic struggle that brings, but likewise a gift to men also, who would confide in and find emotional solace within the spirit of their lovers femininity, expressing momentary vulnerability to the softest of souls in a way that only a man in agape with a woman would dare. A woman who feels safe enough and looked after enough is feminine in the most natural and charming way, momentarily carefree as she “lets her guard down”, she is a happy woman, a sweet woman, a kind woman and perhaps most importantly to our humble species, an attractive woman. Rarely do women get to experience this type of innocence anymore as the forces of feminism masculinise them into perverse hybrids, women composed of the worst that femininity and all her flaws has to offer whilst likewise borrowing the very worst that masculinity has to offer, educated to never let their guard down “in the face of oppression”, be this evangel preached directly through activism or indirectly via the harshness of the workplace and the economic machine that it serves, today’s women face emancipation from femininity, like their fellow-men do from masculinity, sold a narrative that their inherent disposition is incompatible with the gender identity that the prevailing ideology would demand of and subscribe to them.

Just how can the feminine continue to exist within the modern world when it is psychologically beaten out of women on a day-to-day basis? How can women be kind, caring and sensitive when they must work in the world of business, a masculinising albeit sociopathic world of margins, deadlines, quotas, targets, bottom lines and politics? You see the workplace itself undermines the cultivation of femininity, the hardened woman is but a feeble caricature of the ideal man, should she be stripped of her femininity via the hallways of heartbreak, the glass table of the boardroom or perhaps an amalgamation of both, such a woman is a walking emanation of all the ugliest that masculinity has to offer and with none of its perks, for she learns the ugliest of masculinity along a pilgrimage for personal conquest rather than learn it in whole in the way that only a boy who seeks to become a man can. She does not learn the nuances of masculinity, its duty, its honour, it’s burden or it’s inherently biological need to protect and provide and thus forth and so such a woman imposes herself ruthlessly and demandingly, without thought nor care for those she imprints her apathy on, belittling the men she hates along the way with vapid deep-seated hatred, corrupting fellow women in her wake, imploring that they too sacrifice their femininity under the guise of “motherly advice” in the promotion that her younger counterparts become like that which she has become, a caricature of a man, a woman who emulates the worst of masculinity without embodying any of its finer or more nobler traits.

Such a woman is a parasite, wondering what value she can take from those around her rather than what value she can add, she is psychologically unlovable to the desires of man and yet some remnant of femininity remains, she craves to be loved despite the impossibility such a task proves to be. It’s hard to love a monster and men do not love monsters like women do, they loathe them, even fear them and in the most extreme of circumstances, they kill them. You see masculinisation affects women differently than it does men, within men it fosters growth and actualisation, within women it fosters contempt, dissonance and discontent, corrupting the very souls of who they are, stripping them of any desirability beyond the flesh, which too, will eventually fade with age.

Is there anything less feminine in the world than a ball-busting cynical parasite devoid of the charms and femininity that men the world over have come to admire and cherish in women for eons and eons? No, no there is not, and it is the crucifixion of femininity being perpetuated as an affront to masculinity within modern ideology, feminism containing the largest amount of estrogenic blood on its hands, that is unilaterally killing feminine spirituality in favour that we sacrifice it on the altar of corporatism in an effort to “equalise” the feminine with the masculine. What this really means it to condemn the true and natural feminine spirit as weak, to redefine it with masculine ideals, reinforce those ideals and then imprint those ideals onto society’s men and women until they believe this perverse form of femininity is “true femininity”, calling for the worship of this one brand of ideologically sanctioned femininity which remains to be nothing more than a corrupt bastardisation of the femininity that comes naturally to women who are free of Anglo social engineering efforts. What feminism has failed to realise is that although it has benefited many women superficially, it has done so at the cost of that which makes them truly women, that which makes them valuable to men beyond their bodies, the overlooked spiritual sense, the beauty that can be derived from their natural femininity. You see feminism spoils femininity in the name of equality, then the imbeciles who cause the damage are so incredibly ignorant (or incredibly intelligent, I cannot but tell the difference) as they seem to be at such a loss to understand just why men and women, but markedly women, are unhappier than they’ve ever been before.

I do think perhaps one of the most abhorrent things in the modern female psyche is that of scorn. Scorn is something I consider to be a truly fascinating state of being, you see scorn is a particular feminine flavour of revenge, it is effectively revenge on steroids with a feminine twist. Scorn is where the death of femininity within the soul of a woman rebirths itself vengefully in a manner of heightened sociopathy, such a woman bears the physical hallmarks of the feminine form, but to her very soul is ravaged by the most detestable, despicable and deplorable facets of both the masculine and the feminine. A scornful woman who derives her current state of being from the defining moment which initiated the destruction of her spirit’s femininity is a woman who is emulating the traits of man, straying from the path of womanhood and crossing into the realm of manhood, albeit such a woman will never truly be a man for she will lack the logic of a man, the appearance of man as well as the burden and societal expectation of a man, and so thus at best her bitterness leads to this type of quasi woman, a caricature of a man, embodying but the worst traits of both the masculine and the feminine, leaving us with what can only be described as a hollow, hybrid monstrosity that is neither man nor woman in the truest sense of the word regardless of its physical anatomy.

You see unlike men who can become better, stronger and more attractive men by growing through their pain and thus amplifying their inherent masculine energy, women do not become better women with pain, they become more manlike, and thus they are stripped of that which makes them attractive to men to begin with. See what is good for man, at least in this instance, is not good for woman. When women become “hardened” it, rather poetically, and quite ironically in its majesty, strips them of the very thing that makes them attractive beyond the realm of the physical to men in the first place, it emancipates them from their femininity, and to ensure a man truly loves a woman, and simply doesn’t just view such a woman as a disposable fuck puppet at best or a blathering idiot at worst, she must capture his interest psychologically and emotionally, not just physically, because many women can capture the eye of a man, but only a woman of some real feminine energy and depth can capture the heart and thus devotion of a man. You see femininity, like masculinity, must be cultivated, although rather unlike masculinity it mustn’t be taught through pain, but through love.

Puppy love is the exception: it is the one love that can be educational to men. Puppy love is the inevitable experience in which naivety prevails, boys become men, and they learn first-hand through the misery of heartbreak and the cacophonous confusion of the indecisive female mind that the unilateral worship and adoration of the feminine form, the willingness to be captivated in the beauty of the feminine form, be it from the sound of her voice, to the touch of the skin, or the smell of her sweat, is nothing but a futile and suicide-inducing endeavour. Men learn for themselves in their quest for masculinity that they must not worship women, but rather, that they must lead them. Women do not go on a quest for femininity; they are born with it, and oft sacrifice it short-sightedly for power within the depths of delusion that makes up modern groupthink, only to realise in old age once their beauty has faded that they traded in their greatest intangible asset long ago.

Relevant Reading:

Buy “Fascinating Womanhood” in the USA
Buy “Fascinating Womanhood” in the UK
Buy “Fascinating Womanhood” in Canada


  1. ‘What feminism has failed to realise is that although it has benefited many women superficially, it has done so at the cost of that which makes them truly women, that which makes them valuable to men beyond their bodies, the overlooked spiritual sense, the beauty that can be derived from their natural femininity’

    Every time I read/hear the notion that women are only valuable to guys for their bodies, it always got me thinking “No, that can’t be right…” but I couldn’t put my finger on what exactly they provided that was so valuable. Your post explains this missing factor wonderfully, thank you.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Its soo true.. just look at how hardened some women are.
      i remember the styles of the 1980s, when, IMO, was the last time women had actually ‘pretty’ styles.–now, they are tattooing all over, even in masculine places such as the forearm and neck.
      Ever since the 90s, it became rare to see young women in anything but pants, and if she happened to wear a skirt, it had to be short!!
      i actually feel sorry for young women 18-35 today unless they get into a special group if they want to be married–since when they ‘shackup’ he gets EVERYTHING and she get NOTHING or nothing much to hang on to


      1. what if i like wearing tats. what if i enjoy pants. I honestly think its more about freedom of choice rather than a political statement to be more masculine. There may be people like this but whats wrong with that? There are women who are also lesbian and is preferred to wear manly clothes

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You haven’t really read the article he you? You can do and wear what you want, as can men. The consequences of your choices will be for you to bear.

          Liked by 1 person

      2. Dear Jubilee, i keep asking myself, can women’s clothing get any uglier…silly question. i cannot help but to notice an aura of discontentment, stifled rage surrounding 50-ish women. And they’re always wearing pants. Is their possibly a correlation here? Yes, pants have a purpose – that heavy snow we had recently, i put on the one pair i own, and went outside to help shovel.


  2. Your posts are work of art indeed!

    Take your time but keep em coming!

    Appreciate your contribution to TRP and you became my favorite no doubt!

    Keep it up Big Homie!!


  3. It’s always quite difficult to think of a reply to your posts because they are so comprehensive. Just know that your writing affects real men’s lives in positive ways. Never have I had such abundance with women since I adopted a praxeology most congruent with the real World. Your writing has formed part of my character.
    Chaps, encourage all your women by rewarding feminine behaviours and punishing non-feminine.


  4. Your observation about women becoming more masculine as they experience hardships sounds fine to me (paragraph 3). The part I disagree with is that this would make a women less desirable. I don’t think it would matter as long as hadn’t changed physically having an effect on her fertility.
    The only thing I could think of that would support them being less desirable would be that males would now see her as having lost some maternal instincts. Any thoughts?


    1. since your name is TYLER.. i assume you are in your 20s and havent seen many real 2 parent non divorced families\
      many of these guys weren’t looking for mommy since they worked hard all day and she was protected


    2. Well, it’s not unreasonable that a woman being hardened would reduce her fertility, it would be a reasonable hypothesis to test scientifically.


      1. I tried searching youtube could not find the video link. There was an american woman in Afghanistan last year who lost her ability to conceive. She was on CNN, telling other women not to join the army as it happened to quite a few of them. The news reporter, a feminazi looked at her with disgust.

        I have been reading this blog for the past 12 hours. I have still not come to terms with the Authors’ age. This dude is just brilliant.

        Keep it up.


    3. I’ll
      Disagree with you on this one ,
      When a woman gets hurt , I’m talking down deep hurt. When her spouse does no longer protect her , in protecting her I’m meaning not only physically but to protect her hopes and dreams , goals , passions , her dedication , her commitment . When a husband decides to not be her protector , where is she to turn ? Emotionally ? But broken and cold . How do women feel feminine , when being feminine opened them up to this heart ache . Now some women push through and put that heart ache on the back burner and make a choice to still love their live and their God given right to be a lady . But let me tell you to be a lady in a world where masculinity is winning is very hard , amazingly rewarding but very hard.

      Liked by 1 person

    4. I am late to this discussion but men are surrounded and engulfed by harness their entire lives. The softness of feminine is the one thing men are not able to achieve themselves, and that is what makes it so priceless. And it is respected by men even when there isn’t a sexual relationship.


  5. Thank you. I agree on virtually every point. You nailed it.
    You cover the subject with finesse and thoroughness. I also argue along the same lines but with less eloquence. I’ve been posting the same thoughts in simpler terms for almost seven years at http://wwnh.wordpress.com.
    A. Guy Maligned

    Liked by 1 person

  6. What a great article, it makes so much sense and you write in such a fluent, coherent way that it was a pleasure to read. It’s such a shame that women have forsaken their natural femininity to try to mimic men. The kind of loving, feminine woman you describe is exactly what I like and I’m gonna take a wild guess and say that’s what most men go for too!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. As the saying goes: “No man can be a prophet in his own land.” Anglo-Saxon culture is unique among Europeans in the way it marginalizes women. That marginalization culminated in a British law that woman could not own or inherit any property (and that was not Dark Ages, that was 18th and 19th century). That law was unique, as women were allowed to hold property all across Europe.

    As a result English and American feminists internalized that inferiority: in their quest to prove themselves equal individual they strived to show they can be as manly as the men themselves. American Feminists just like the entire Anglo-Saxon culture perceive femininity as something inferior.

    That is not so in my own culture. Norse and Slavic women were always extremely tough, forged in the reality of unforgivingly hostile climate and almost constant warfare, in which they had no choice but to actively partake. None of that required giving up on being a woman. Household maintenance and child rearing was always as critical to survival as good swordsmanship, most often even more critical (Napoleon himself said that wars are won with logistics, not firepower, as most soldiers in any conflict die from hunger and disease, not from fighting).

    The article is as wrong as it is well written. It is rooted in British and American belief that women are inferior by default and the only equality a woman can attain is through becoming a man.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Islam is taking over in the nurse countries.. If the women lead or are similar to men in owning things, they won’t be later


  8. I think ‘femineity’ would be correct rather than ‘femininity’.

    The article is so true: I’ve seldom found truly feminine women. I know that because I fall for them each time.


  9. Puppy love lol been there done that. It was the single most learning experience of my life especially when it comes to women. She would have been all over me had i done the exact opposite of what i did lol hindsight is 20/20 here.

    Does it happen to everyone? Does everyone learns from it(and takes the redpill like i did)? Is it the essential part of transitioning from boy to man? Does it happens to naturals too? And then they learn from it? Or they start slaying poon early from the word go?

    Keep up the good work. More DT/Game posts please. Your blog is much appreciated.


  10. I must say that the thing I find most disgusting about the whole feminist dynamic is the belief that women MUST compete against man. That’s fine and dandy when competing in the working world, where it gets off the rails is that women cannot stop competing with HER man. In other words, she carries her competition of men into a relationship, constantly pitting her will against her mates, opting to subvert the cooperative nature dynamic in a relationship.

    I often told my ex that we should be on the same team, rather than be in opposition of each other.

    I used to think my ex was a psychopath, or at least suffers from a malady of cluster B traits. However, I’m finding that the feminist narrative simply promotes and protects those characteristics to develop and evolve, eventually making a woman nothing but a toxic parasite. Both demanding “equality” in benificial rights, meanwhile denying “responsibilities” in accountability areas, by simply throwing those responsibilities back upon her partner.

    Affirmitive action, domestic abuse law (through the Duluth Model of abuse), and subsequent family law bias, create an environment very advantageous to women whom have no compunction towards any sense of morality. Simply they take advantage of their advantage, “because she can”, with little to no regard to “but should she”.

    Keep up the great work.


  11. As a woman I really enjoyed your writing! You’ve included everything that bothered me recently. I hope more women read this and open their eyes. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Even though i understood half of that because english isn’t my first languege. I totally agree what you say, i realized this like a year ago maybe and i mean i live in sweden, woo and that country is very very loving of the whole feminist thing. Its the country of feminist not even joking. My mum is pretty feminine but i don’t know if i am, in my core maybe but yeah i think I’m a mix, is there anything that i can do to make me feminine? That sound stupid but yeah hope you understand what i mean.


    1. Hey Bella,
      I to am wanting to recover my femininity, and one thing I’ve found very helpful is this website: http://www.thefemininewoman.com. It has a lot of examples and explains why men need women to be feminine, and how much more positive power you have over a man when you choose to do so.


  13. I think an article articulating how a woman can be feminine would be useful with examples. It’s also cultural. I think what’s lost is for women is a sense of duty and a more “if I’m not happy I’m leaving”. It’s not red pill blue pill BS it’s that women have no intention of staying.

    ” for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.”
    Who really believes in this day a wife would say in the sickness/poorer part and not just leave. Women are no longer helpmeets but mercenary users. That’s the big problem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Many women do stay. I have stayed for 16 years and each year my man made less and less $, dropped all his friends and became entirely dependent on me. Seriously. I am horrified by it but I now want to go find a whole man- is that wrong? I feel guilty for it: your posts mostly elude to women leaving men because we are shrewd, uncaring and selfish and I am none of those things. 90% of what we wear is bought at the thrift store- it’s the only way to live in LA on a five digit salary -and at least I am debt free. I paid down his debt once and he slowly has worked it back up. His credit is now 750 where it was in the high 500s when i met him.

      Should I stay forever despite being exhausted from carrying this burden? Are there not exceptions to the rule on the perception of why women leave? It’s tough because he is not cruel to me; he is loving and we have an active sex life (we still have sex 3-4 times a week) but it’s now almost entirely hollow for me.

      I don’t want a feminine, needy and dependent man anymore. But I also don’t want something drastic to happen to him if he realizes he has nothing, not even me anymore. It is weighing very heavy on my soul and I don’t know what to do and how to approach this.

      I came from a family whose parents stayed married 52 years until my dad died from cancer. They had a tumultuous relationship but remained sexually active until the end of his life- my mother was not a nurturing and doting mother but very selfish, I think that stems from her getting pregnant at 17 and getting married shortly thereafter. My dad was an alcoholic and they triggered each other constantly – we make jokes that she drove him to drink. Probably pretty true, but he stuck around, his Masonic father made sure of it and when my mother kicked him out after three years of marriage after he messed around and went back home, his own father advised him to do the responsible thing and bet his wife to take him back so the children have a stable home life. Two of my siblings are still married to their first spouses with two kids each, one other has a host of kids with numerous women but never been married and then me – two marriages, no kids.

      My husband is from a single mother environment where she married a host of men who mostly abused her physically and emotionally and also my husband was abused by at least his own father and one of her ex husbands. He has no connection to men or any real male role models. He has no kids and no previous marriages but his sister has one former short marriage and is now married again, was unfaithful once in the marriage and told him and he stayed and they had a kid shortly thereafter.

      What’s the answer to a chronically feminized man with no male role models? Do I stay forever to assuage the guilt? I feel the best thing I could do is force him to grow up by dumping him because feminine encouragement has not worked obviously.


      1. Whether you leave him or not, tell him read this website. Specifically, get him to read Monk Mode and Suffering of the Lost Boys. You have been something of a mother to him, and this is a perversion of nature. He should have been something of a father to you. This may sound superficially perverse to the unwise, but it is not (read the essay: Hierarchy of Love) – this is the natural, healthy way. Good luck.


      2. His parents had a codependent relationship and his mother is probably borderline – that means her parents weren’t there for her and so her self-worth is low. Therefore she latched on to narcissists. In a codependent relationship, one person is usually the enabler – he or she causes the relationship to go on despite it being wrong. I should know, my ex-GF was an enabler. Have them check out books on codependency, best if the author has been codependent herself. In such a relationship the children are leaned on for filling an emotional void. It’s VERY very unhealthy – usually the children leave and move away from the parents as FAR as they can as soon as they can in order to finally stop the emotional vampirism. If possible, another country. I did the latter.

        But you have to find your own happiness – if you think that your marriage goes nowhere for some years, it goes nowhere. What I would mean if I said “women leaving in sickness” is literally man gets sick -> 2 weeks later his girlfriend leaves him. Such girls DO exist.

        Should I stay forever despite being exhausted from carrying this burden?

        Do NOT unduly carry the emotional burden of another person. I did that way too long and it fucked me up. STOP.

        But I also don’t want something drastic to happen to him if he realizes he has nothing, not even me anymore.

        That would be emotional blackmail. Who told you that would happen? Him?

        You would not be responsible.

        What’s the answer to a chronically feminized man with no male role models?

        He has to WANT to get better. Have him read this blog.

        He should build friendships with other men – these are forged via shared activities, so he should pick up manly hobbies. For example (just an example – because I do it) working on cars. There are hobby garages which charge something like USD 7/hour. Most of the stuff that can be done on a car needs TWO people because the stuff is too heavy. DO NOT BE THE SECOND PERSON as a woman. He has to ask some of the other guys there. An old car which can be restored (for example a 1988 Peugeot 205) costs something like USD 300 and its restoration can provide enjoyment and camaraderie for many months when done once a week.


      3. Hi please look into undiagnosed adult High Functioning Autism-[Autism without intellectual impairment- (diagnostically requiring average or above average intelligence)
        (High Functioning AS was previously called Asperger’s syndrome)
        Because Autism Spectrum disorders have only been a relatively currant understanding, all the research has only been predominantly on children. I think it was first thought that only children had Autism.
        It’s now known of course that Autism isn’t a developed condition, it’s almost impossible for the neurotypical mind (non Autistic) to understand the experience of the neurodiverse mind because it’s an entirely different- and i think opposite in most ways- information processing operating system.
        Think of PC/Android vs Apple. One system is alien to the outer and how it functions and processes information. So much so it’s as though ASD is a whole new sub-species of human evolution.
        Its very much becoming evident that there is an entire generation of adults that have been left behind and don’t know they have Autism. It can cause extreme devastation.
        But also especially look into the female presentation because it’s now understood females can have entirety different traits and social interaction where they can study, learn and mimic normal interaction behaviours and completely mask all signs of Autism. But at a cost.
        I’m without doubt that the female presentation cannot only occur in just females and that men with more ‘female’ brain wiring (Beta males?) must also be able to have the version of ASD.
        I had to add that because if your husband is more on that end of the spectrum, the classical ASD descriptions and diagnostic terms may seem miles off.

        Liked by 1 person

  14. it’s true. a lot of women have lost the ability to be feminine. the feminist movement has made a lot of women feel that if they stay home, raise families, let the man be the leader, that there is something wrong with them. we are made to feel like we are weak, stupid, and can’t think for ourselves. they shout us down. in doing so they have made some men mad at all women. I was not raised with the feminist mindset. some of these women really want it all. there is nothing wrong with having a nice life. a man who has a loving, caring, nurturing wife will make sure that her life. he will want to provide the things she needs and wants. all he wants in return is someone who loves him and loves him. I don’t know why feminists have such a hard time with that concept. I love providing a nice, warm, nurturing environment for my husband. I am proud of our home, I keep it clean, I make sure he has clean clothes, and nice meals. I am not loud and rude to him in private or public, and he is not rude to me in public or private. I don’t have tattoos, I love my long hair because we both find it to be sexy, and I love wearing dresses. I know I am every feminists nightmare. I just feel that things have gotten out of hand with relationships between men and women, and women like myself who are not feminists need to get a louder voice and stand together before they erode relationships further.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Amazing writing! I’m starting to wonder if you’re from this planet! Seriously, if you are ever in NJ It would be an honor to buy you dinner and drinks.


  16. European women are much better at being feminine, it is shame that the US has become so callused in this great reach to join feminism. Men love women, not women wanting to be them. It’s above all a great turn off for many of us, including myself. It’s refreshing to see even in this age a woman who acts like a woman. I applaud any woman who is herself.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I just stumbled into this website and I am not familiar with the author of this article but, my goodness! It is really wonderful … it puts into words so much of what I have experienced, thought, intuited, felt throughout my life. I have always avoided certain environments, activities, people, etc. because they felt so wrong. Whereas most young women always had lots of girlfriends I always felt out of place around most females and when I was younger I just felt like a freak, really, for being different and for feeling the way I felt. But as a young woman I noticed that I always felt more comfortable around men than women – I prefer their company, really. Men have a kind of honor and trustworthiness that women don’t and this puts me at ease and I find I can be myself around them. The male sex has always been kinder to me than my own sex has and I have seen that men are capable of greater love than women are. So, I like men … and that’s probably why they like me, too!
    It is sad that, for so long, I felt like something was wrong with me (for not being more “assertive”, “proactive”, blah blah blah). Fortunately, over time I realized that there is nothing wrong with me for being the way I am. I am feminine and that’s a good thing. Now that I’m older I can see that the activities, people and environments I always avoided were those that were injurious to my essence and that could have warped me if I had been over exposed to them. This article really nails it on so many levels. Excellent! Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. I disagree. Pain doesn’t make women masculine it makes them more feminine. It’s unearned power that makes women masculine.

    Women when they suffer become more submissive and more eager to seek a provider and protector. It’s only when this is not available do they as a last resort masculinize and compete with men.

    It’s the same with men, only we can’t offer submissive sex and obedience to another man to get protected and provided for. Instead we have to provide real value in the form of work.

    Give power to anybody who hasn’t earned it (and thus been humbled), and they will become monsters. Since women rarely earn much (usually living off the state or a man), when given power they naturally become monsters.

    Women are supposed to be humbled by men, day in day out, highlighting their feminine submissive natures, which they embrace. The problem is western society has prevented this from happening and so women grow up believing they are just as capable and the same as men are.


  19. It’s true that feminists prize masculine qualities over feminine ones. They sneer at feminine women and put them down. Taking pride in ourselves as women makes no sense to them. I can’t understand their mentality and am unable to get along with them. They’re far too aggressive and domineering.


  20. Hi,
    I am a woman and I am going to save this article for a time when I can read through it thoroughly. As it is I am on a break and just skimmed the whole thing. I didn’t read anything I disagreed with. I have been on a quest for years to become more feminine as an adult, because as a child I was not taught to value feminine things. Now I like to wear feminine clothing and long hair, and I am learning to nurture feminine traits such as care-giving, cooking, being soft and quiet and playful, submissive but not a doormat.

    As someone who has been through a marriage with an abusive man, I can say a girl can go through pain and a betrayal by someone who is supposed to protect her, and still not become tough and hardened. It is a choice, and I think it also has to do with having a supportive community. I’ve been able to lean on my family and friends for help and support, and therefore while I am definitely scarred in some ways, I don’t feel bitter or the need to put men down in general. I have seen many women in my position become very hard and loud, very masculine. I think it’s up to us women to encourage each other to be soft and value what we are instead of trying to change into something we’re not. We’ve all got to be supportive of one another.

    There are too many things in this article for me to comment on right now, but I appreciate it and want to say that there are some feminine girls left and I’m going to do my best to encourage my young daughter to be a true lady, too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your thoughts Ms. D!

      It is very encouraging to read a comment from someone who values women acting according to their nature. Women are not teaching their daughters and granddaughters to have morals and values and act like ladies.


  21. Throughout the ages, men were seeking for reasons to blame women. Once they were witches when they gained more wisdom. At another time, when they started to show off more skin and femininity, they were blamed as whores. Nowadays they are labeled as unfeminine feminists and monsters. This is a result of men’s profoundly rooted fear of women having in fact always been stronger, more spiritual and smarter without having to show their strength by making war and depriving others especially weaker individuals. One commentator wrote about Norse and Slavic women who always had to be tough. I would like to instance German women after WWII who had to rebuild Germany and did not have the time to wait and whine for the missing strong men. I agree with the point that early feminists of the seventies were really unadorable in their behaviour and appearance. But today, in fact intelligent, strong and successful women ARE sexy, feminine, spiritual and adorable. They have more abilities than men ever could gain, especially their ability to give birth ALTHOUGH they also can be tough and successful. It’s only men’s fear to be exposed as being equivalent at most or even less that makes monsters of women with an upright attitude. Men also fear not being needed any more. Men always have been competing to show that they are no. 1 and irreplaceable. From childhood to old age. Nowadays, in this form men still present themselves they are rediculous archaic relicts having missed evolution. No single educated woman really needs a man anymore except for reproduction. And that’s what frightens men. That’s why they and a handful of lame women are crying out for more femininity and devotion for dominant men. I believe that it’s not the women who have to change, because everytime they changed or not, they were blamed anyway although they have always remained feminine even in trousers. No feminist ever cut off her breasts or had a surgery to have a penis. You all have to admit, these are the only items, that make an individual masculine or feminine – penis, vagina, breasts, XX or XY. All the specifications of a feminine or masculine character are socially determined and conditioned. Thus, in fact it’s not time for women being more feminine in the old conditioned meaning, no, it’s time for a change in the social determination of what is feminine or masculine or even better, what is human(e).

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Solopsism at its finest. Why don’t you get down in the sewers, doing the building and maintaining them so others like you can live the same delusion you are living in.

      If it weren’t for (primarily) men at large, your ilk would still be living in caves scrounging around for bugs and berries to eat.


      1. Yep, I’ve listened to this B.S. thousands of times and even though I took it seriously at first, my own experience with women proved it was all rationalization, exactly as the author of this site claims.


      2. Hear! Hear! But tell this to a feminist and she’ll say you’re being sexist. But seriously, have these bitches even looked at or seen male anatomy?

        He’s bigger than the female and has more muscle mass than her. That’s why the most dangerous jobs in the world men do. Women nurture. Men protect.

        Feminists have that lie, they want to believe that lie, and they want everyone else to believe it as well.


    2. You cite German women after WWII. Purely by your statements you have no idea what it was like after the war – very ignorant of German history.

      WWII was also a stark contrast to WWI, where most of the casualties were military (i.e. men) not civilian (a mix). There were many women that perished and there were vast differences between the occupying foces – Russian occupation zone specifically.

      In short your allusion that women, without men, had to rebuild Germany is completely inaccurate. Millions of male German soldiers did actually make it home.

      If you truly knew anything about German culture, you would understand how German woman are compared to others, specifically American. Your example of how German women supposedly were/are is actually more based on their culture rather than the fact that they are women.

      Deine Verstehen von Deutsche Geschicte ist mindestens, schlect. Deutsche Frauen noch weniger.


  22. Feminists are killing the feminine world . Why can’t women be women and men be men ?
    I have no want or need to beat the men at my job , I do amazingly well as a woman , with love and compassion . Women have an amazingly hard job why do feminists feel they need to make it harder ? We are the nurterer , women whether you like it or not men are not and will never be hardwired to be the nurterer . Nor will a woman ever become a protector . I am proud to be feminine , I love being soft and very much appreciate a good man , feminists want a nice guy , men walk away , if your woman doesn’t appreciate you for being a good man , for working hard and for being the head of your home , if your woman doesn’t lift you up , encourage and love your spirit ( not agressive but strong spitit)then she just wants a nice guy . My advice to all the great men out there .. If you don’t stand for your integrity you’ll never stand for anything !!


  23. Though the mediums appear different, Feminism and Pornography are two sides of the same coin,both ideologies working from different angles and genders ,cross pollinating and creating an endless cycle of self-pity and recriminatory resentment.


  24. Lol Skysand, your post is everything he pointed out. You are the very example everyone who thinks for themselves sees as feminism and why they absolutely DESPISE it and the other ugly masculine women that screech from the top of their lungs this bullshit at colleges and everywhere else.

    You and all the other femininnies are the reason WHY American men and women are looking for FOREIGN mates.

    Women don’t want Manchildren and men don’t want masculine women.

    I can’t bring myself to type all of your response as my rebuttal, but I’ll make sure it’s quite clear what I’m rebuking.

    Reasons to blame women throughout history, using witches as an example.

    This had NOTHING to do with women and all about RELIGION.

    Women starting to show off more skin and more femininty.

    What is “more femininty?” This made no sense.

    “Unfeminine feminists and monsters”

    You ARE UNFEMININE feminitwits. As for monsters I wouldn’t call you all that because that would be disgracing monsters. Monsters unlike you all are awesome.

    Man’s profound fear of women being more stronger.

    This only makes sense biologically not physically. Male babies have a higher death rate.

    Men showing their strength by making war.

    Possibly one of the dumbest things I have read. Guess you forget about religion, politics, or resources issues. NEXT!

    German women not waiting and whining for strong men to come rebuild germany.

    You are making it sound like that there were NO men whatsoever around. I missed that one in history. Being a WWII enthusiast your lie falls flat. Also women back in the day weren’t whiny pissy babies who didn’t whine and wait for people to make a cause happen…unlike you feminists and SJW idiots…

    “No single educated women needs a man anymore except for reproduction.”

    Ahhhh…Spoken like a true female arachnid that you are!

    “No feminist ever had to cut off her breasts or had a surgery to have a penis. You all have to admit, these are the only items that make an individual masculine or feminine -penis, vagina, XX, or XY.”

    Nope, wrong again you are! The transpeople would severely disagree with you. YOU are a MASCULINE FEMALE.

    “Thus, in fact it’s not time for women being more feminine in the old conditioned meaning”

    There is NO old conditioned meaning. The truth of the matter is that you feminists and SJWs want to PERVERT biology. You cannot change biology. Human males and females, we are SEXUALLY DIMORPHIC.
    The male human is bigger than you you pathetic feminist female. He will always be stronger than you.

    You. YOU and feminism is why men don’t act like men and women don’t act like women. Feminism NEEDS TO DIE.


  25. I somewhat agree, a woman who act instinctively nowadays is looked down upon as weak.

    But what you envision cannot exist because of the divide in power, which lead to extreme inequality and therefor abuse.

    For one, it would be a dangerous situation for a woman to rely completely on a man for everything. If he dies, or leave her, what is to become of her and her children?

    You also sometimes speak of woman as though they have no individual souls, like they are all the same and merely here to bear children and keep house. I agree with the feminine traits being important, and that we are pushing against the instincts of females with all this hardening and that it leads to unhappiness – but you must also be aware that all humans have a need to feel special, its something both sexes need. Anyone can have a family, so many people, men and women, find this their uniqueness in a career.

    The stigma I am concerned with, is not their ability to support themselves, but that women nowadays are frowned upon if they possess or seek feminine qualities. You shouldn’t be a stay at home other, work as a nurse, be “girly”, or wear feminine items or the colour pink, or gasp need or rely on a man for anything.


  26. I disagree with one thing, women being through real harsships (wars, poverty etc.) can become more feminine and appreciative of men. For example the women from the generation of the 50s had to face what ti was like without men, that is why a lot of them tried hard to become pleasant and people talk about “the glorious 50s” even today.

    Feminism is mostly a result of a sheltered, western lifestyle. If women are too sheltered and spoiled, they become less appreciative of men.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I just find it amusing that when asked to look at ways that society is able to indoctrinate traditional societal and gender norms on young children alongside stereotypical view of traditional femininity, this article is top of the search criteria.


    1. That’s such a narrow criteria it effectively otherises and labels anything that isn’t Marxist academic sociology/gender studies babble as “indoctrination.” The lack of free thinking and tolerance to alternate view points in modern academia, particularly the social sciences, is seriously scary – as that’s where the smart, open-minded people are supposed to be. It’s not supposed to be a bastion of compliant and inculcated drones receiving dogmatic “progressive” sermons from professors, but alas.

      In reality the jokes on you, as all the so-called “progressive” ideology stemming out of critical theory is what actual indoctrination looks like. Not some guy writing essays on a blog, and certinaly not traditionalism. You’re inverting reality here, probably because you’ve studied social sciences in university and have been programmed to believe their ideas are progressive and enlightened rather than regressive socially engineered claptrap. High civilization was built on traditionalism, and it’s only because we’ve been as successful as we have with traditional ideas that perversities such as cultural marxism even have the opportunity to exist. It’s traditionalist tolerance that allows the bigotry and intolerance of the “progressive” intelligentsia to spread it’s deceitful and destructive teachings under the guise of education.

      Really one must ask themselves, what sounds more like indoctrination? An essayist sharing their opinion on their blog, or an institution that requires you to take out huge debt, go to a building for years and be told over and over again that their ideas are legitimate and that you’re effectively being enlightened as opposed to being programmed.

      On this blog I share my ideas and let the reader decide for themselves. In academia, you toe the “socially progressive” line or you’re a “nazi” that commits social and career suicide. Hardly sounds tolerant, does it? Indoctrination indeed.

      Liked by 1 person

  28. While I agree that feminine traits have been looked down upon in recent history and erroneously neglected and chocked out of women, I disagree wholeheartedly with your assertion that men dislike intelligence and experience in women. I am highly intelligent 🤓 and read and travel. I soak knowledge up like a sponge. I also love my nurturing, kind and understanding side. I think these are some of my better traits. But while advocating for true femininity, you will turn many a woman away by any notion that this means they must be or act ignorant. That’s part of today’s problem. And probably why women fought for rights. I see it today in the women who think they have one of two choices, climb the corporate ladder or pretend to be dumb as a viable way to show femininity. And men have been brainwashed that they can’t have the whole package in a woman. They have to choose between the prude and the uninhibited “free” woman. So many women with self-respect and morals are looked over for the powerful woman who needs a good time, blah blah blah. Anyhoo don’t confuse a loving caring woman for someone who ONLY needs a family to take care of. We have other interests and aspirations without neglecting those we love. Don’t make women choose sides. We’re not cookie cutter.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s not intelligence that’s the issue – it’s receiving a mainstream education at any one of America’s Marxist leaning universities, which is most of them; the one does not equate the other.

      Liked by 1 person

  29. WWNH led me here. This article was definitely worth reading and calls for self-examination. There’s nothing like femininity to bring out the best in masculine men.


  30. As a middle aged kinda man….I know two men who committed suicide after their wives cheated on them,yet stole everything in divorce courts making the men slaves,who after the divorce settlements realized they were slaves and checked out early…

    One man I know,his wife left him one day after the check was put into his bank account,after the sale of a dead relatives house he had inherited…It was about 100,000 grand.I love the dude but sadly he is such a mangina,still waits with baited breath for her every phone call and the idea she implants in his head that she might come back one day,while she dates other men on the side…He is just another sh#t stick I gotta lick in seeing a man commit suicide the hard way,from the bottom of a liquer bottle.

    Almost every man I know has been divorced and destroyed, or in the least is being made to pay child support,to women who kicked the man out of the house themselves for a child support check,that childs name is not chucky,its checky.

    The mental illness of American women has become obvious.Women in America leading the world in abortion,obesity,single motherhood,divorce and most likely college and credit card debts…

    Who wear mens crew cuts,refuse as women to play any traditional female roles,while requiring men to provide for and protect women who are supposedly mens equals…While everything a woman will touch today was manufactured,invented,set up and delivered by man…

    Please forgive me baby jesus but American women have become obvious a-holes….Who celebrate fat acceptance while little kids in the world die of starvation,being raised by disney princess movies,believing they have the perceived choice of millions of men to chose from through online dating and social media for a boyfriend or a husband,who march in the streets with pus#y hats on their heads,who gladly have aborted 60,000,000 babies with the morning after pill available,over 30 contraceptives total,who are glad men are denied the right to opt out of fatherhood,….aborting the future feminists of America out of their own vagina’s…having sex out of wedlock while the aids virus is on the streets…

    Hoards of disney princess single mothered whor#s in bars dancing to beyonce’s song,”If you liked it you shoulda put a ring on it,”who never required a man to put a ring on it,”with the only rings being their big floppy guts and stretch marks that go”around their sheer girth.

    Strong and independant women who hate the mirror of truth so deeply,who are not strong or independant,who wish to shut down the truth by declaring,”you are encouraging women to commit suicide through your shaming.”Who as strong women are not fit,curvy women do not have roles,and as independant women are always flat broke…..who claim independance living off of men and the state through lifetime alimony,child support,maternal presumption,no fault divorce,for blocks of govt cheese,free phones,for medicaid,food stamps,for section 8 apartments and as black and white women gladly take black mens jobs and college admission through affirmative action,while ignoring that equal pay act of 1963.


    Women initiate 75% of the 50% of all marriages that end in divorce…Who as creepy black and white women both take black mens jobs and college admission,who then complain they cant find a good black man,who talk about an imaginary pay disparity and willfully ignore the equal pay act of 1963,……..While insane black women who had no father in their lives,while men refuse to date them…are the ding bats shutting down gay pride parades as black lives matters…

    Blm should be called black womens lives matters,because nobody wants them,with it being so obvious women inparticularly are doing stupid female human tricks in the streets for attention from the father they didnt have in their own lives,from other men,or from a dog,cat,homeless man or from the media in their Nietsz-esque will to power through professional victimhood….Let the damzel in distress in America cry from her awful bed she has made all by herself.She has so self destructed,that womens gay gal pals are even tired of womens diseny princess attitudes and ways….Many transgendered women are hated by other women,because in many cases gays and trasgenders respectively are more feminine looking,have longer hair and have better hygiene than straight women in America!!! Sweet smelling baby sh#t American women are insane.

    Sadly,gay men better watch out,if you ever have a moment of weakness….I knew a woman named miss mary farty pants,who has a gay man on child support.When friends saw this woman out with this man,everyone knew he was gay,”except for the woman.” They had sex so maybe he was a little bisexual….who knows,but he is as gay as any gay man I have ever met,and now has a boyfriend….Sadly,a literal gay man is now paying child support.NO ONE IS SAFE FROM THIS WESTERN PREDATOR FEMALE POSING AS A HOUSE PET(REFERENCE FROM FIGHT CLUB)







  31. Incredible drivel. Everyone is an individual and you paint with far too broad of a brush. Masculinity is not the sole provence of men and femininity is not the sole provence of women. Not everyone is even straight, for pete’s sake. You can prefer whatever you prefer in your own life without degrading the lifestyles and attitudes of others, who are happy with their choices. Fortunately there are enough people in the world for like-minded individuals to find & enjoy one another’s company.

    Reading this post makes me incredibly grateful for my husband, who is secure in his manhood and doesn’t need me to be a damn flower by comparison. As a rough woman who owns her own computer business, lifts heavy weights and eschews frills, I’m sure I frighten you all beyond measure XD. Good luck to you though. I’m glad you have a safe space here to express yourselves, no matter how silly you sound. Just be sure to keep it here and don’t push it on the rest of us please. We’ve worked hard for equality; thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Great article. If I might add, Nikola Tesla had said something very interesting regarding the masculinizing of women in modern society. He said quite eloquently that the striving for dominance over men is why he disdains the modern day woman. Tesla was never married. In his early days that was because he deified woman to such an extent that he felt unworthy of them. These women being your traditional, soft-spoken submissive women who sought to complement and please their spouse. He thought of them to be even better than men. But soon feminism took hold over Western civilization and Tesla saw how women, in their ignorance, felt like they had to become like men to become better. How ironic that they only decreased their value in the eyes of the majority of men. Just like no respectable man is attracted to steroid-filled bodybuilding woman with lats big enough to glide through the sky like flying squirrels, no respectable man is attracted to a woman that acts like a man. At least, not attracted to them beyond the superficial (superficial attraction to those women that act like men, I know no man that is attracted to women with shoulders like Ronnie Coleman).

    This is why, later on in his life, Tesla decided to still not marry. Where he first thought women to be above him, on this high pedestal he placed them on, he now thought of them beneath him. He gave a great analogy as to where mankind is headed if women become like men and men like women. You’ll have a matriarchal society like that found in bees. Where woman work and men are at their mercy. Where men are used and killed off.

    not sure about the last part but there is some truth to what he said.

    Here’s a link to the YT video that inspired me to write this comment. I’m not completely sure whether it verified that he actually said this or not but I do like the message. Feminism, unlike the name would suggest, is the death of femininity.


  33. “What feminism has failed to realise is that although it has benefited many women superficially, it has done so at the cost of that which makes them truly women, that which makes them valuable to men beyond their bodies, the overlooked spiritual sense, the beauty that can be derived from their natural femininity”

    This basically sums up what has been on my mind for a long time. Thanks for putting them in a single succinct sentence.


  34. Comments on this article have extended now to over three years, which suggests that it has struck a chord with readers. The book ‘ Feminine Lost: Why Most Women are Male’ by Jennifer Granger, a self-proclaimed ‘transformational coach with a world-wide clientele’, expresses similar sentiments. It was published at about the same time as this blog article. The reviews of that book along with comments on this article, are predictably polarized between feminists – and this is after all their subject, and everyone else it seems. Granger believes that men prefer feminine women and these gentler members of the sex are becoming increasingly difficult to find in Western society. One reviewer, undoubtedly feminist, described Granger’s book as ‘ part pseudo-psychological unscientific bullshit’ and my guess is that she would direct the same criticism at this article. ‘IllimitableMan’ in a subsequent post (9/19/16 above), derides social scientists for ‘ lack of free thinking and tolerance to alternate view points’ and there is some justification for this view. But commentary on a subject such as this requires social science studies to provide confirmation of the views expressed, otherwise they are merely opinion . Which is not to say that they are wrong, in fact I agree with them, but just that they need substantiation.

    Here is an excerpt from Granger’s book (p 27):

    [As a man you want a partner to protect and make happy, but all you are finding are male women who can do those things for themselves; they no longer need a man in order to meet their survival needs. These women have lost touch with their feminine selves, and along with it the ability and desire to be receptive. They do not realize this to their detriment, … That leaves any man trying to satisfy his natural male desires with just a precious few feminine women.

    On the flip side of the coin, we have male women who are becoming more and more emotionally desolate, with little understanding of why that is. They have become comfortable operating out of their male aspect and are self-sufficient to the extent that they do not have to rely on anyone for anything. Yet in order to feel fulfilled a woman has to be receptive, a fundamental feminine aspect that many women can no longer find in themselves. Unable to receive, they ache for something they can’t identify. These male women assume it is a romantic connection they are missing, so they find a man they can control and dominate. Since opposite energies attract, they attract feminine men. Unfortunately, their choice often leads to more unhappiness. Since their energetic makeup is the opposite of what it should be, these women become less and less fulfilled as the years go by.] – end of quote

    Science tell us that since the first occurrence of hominids, 99% of our evolution has been as hunter gatherers and only a tiny part of the remaining 1% has occurred since modernity began. This has given rise to the ‘stone age minds in modern skulls’ view of one evolutionary psychologist, that despite the recent rapid social changes, our minds are still influenced by that instinctual cave dweller within us. How often when we feel offended or humiliated do we want to lash out in anger, but then our acculturated nature asserts itself to prevent any uncivilized behavior? (Arguably people who are unable to censor their instincts in this way are disproportionately represented in our prisons). Male attraction to feminine women is very likely an instinct which precedes the coming of the modern assertive female and although feminists may rail against it, some (most?) men will continue to prefer women with traditional femininity – even if that means seeking female companions from a different culture.


    1. I think, this whole long-winded discussion in fact is leading to nowhere. The 21. century should ultimately start to be a millennium of peace and respect among all ethnic groups and genders instead of narcism and the pursuit of power over others. This “trend” should be characterized and supported by synergy. This term describes the balanced and equal interaction of cooperative forces to strengthen each other. Thus, both – men and women – should stop to compete or compare. Every individual either he or she is strong or weak should be respectful towards all forms of human being and only seek for this kind of partner who strengthens himself or herself without being under the smokescreen of satisfaction of his or her narcism.


  35. Perhaps most men are attracted to feminine, dependent women, but not all. Some men don’t wish to grow up, and would rather marry a woman who can be his mommy and take care of him so that he can remain a child and spend endless hours playing video games and ignoring his responsibilities. I would like to ask the author of this blog post if he has any advice for a woman who finds herself married to one of these. He only admires women who are tough and independent because he likes the idea of being taken care of. He even told me before, that when he met me and saw how capable and hardworking I was, he knew I could be the mother for him he never had. God help me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Ms. Patricia,

      I am very sorry about your predicament. It can’t be easy to take both the role of woman and man of the house. If you are a believer in the Most High, I would suggest lots of prayer, as well as perhaps getting people that you trust to talk to him. You can only do so much with such a person. What I can suggest is to be an example for your husband, tell him that you expect him to take up his responsibilities as a man, and leave the rest to God. Your husband will either eventually change or not.


    2. Patricia,

      There is quite a bit of everything in the world today. That is why it is important to identify the red flags our partners reveal during the entire relationship, before marriage. I mean, how could you miss that one??? “A mother for him he never had”? I’m sure there had to be more signs of immaturity displayed from the start. You might find it hard or almost impossible even, to change your husband’s ways. It is not right. After all and according to you, he was pretty damn honest from the beggining. You married him because of who he is. Right? You will have to encourage drive and fire out of his ass. Explain to him what you are going through and how it affects you and how it will affect the relationship if he doesn’t apply himself.

      If I wanted to marry a woman but she then told me how capable I was and that I would be the perfect provider she never had, while she went out and screwed other dudes like a teenager with severe daddy issues. I would probably have sex one more time, end the relationship, moonwalk myself out the door, leave and never return.

      Good Luck!


      1. Thank you Andrew. I didn’t exactly miss the red flags early in the relationship, but I was very young, and foolish enough to believe that he would change once we got married. He did change – for the worse. If I had had even an inkling of how bad my marriage would turn out to be, I would have run screaming from the relationship 20 years ago. But I just didn’t know. And for many years I only enabled his immaturity to grow by trying to be the type of woman outlined in this article – gentle, feminine, submissive. I thought being like that would cause his manly feelings of protectiveness to stir to life, but no. For an immature, lazy, cocky and abusive guy, having a gentle and submissive wife is a free pass to never have to take a look at yourself. I am finally learning to stand up for myself but you are right, it’s impossible to change him now. He’s in his 40s and firmly set in his childish ways. I have to decide now if I want to keep living with an adult child, or not. I do take some responsibility for enabling him all these years, but still, I’m not sure if I want to spend the rest of my life being his mommy.


  36. As a woman i suffer a great lot of pain. My father treated me as a substitute mother and as a slave ( he was using my beauty to parade around ). I thought doing the worst jobs was normal until my mid 20’s . During all that time i was feeling an enormous amount of pain in my soul not understanding why. I had to get really sick to realize that yes my feminity was dying. Why my father wanted his gorgeous little flower to be a man ? then i started to feel like i coudn’t work anymore, I just wanted safety and do feminine activites like sewing, painting etc. It felt so good to be close to my identity. But i had this deep pain in my soul that you describe, a kind of revenge . I would look at the world and see the men not acting like men, complaigning about feminisn but not hardening to the point where a woman can rely on them. You can either be their mom or bob the builder. It shows in the number of couples we see now where the woman is way more older that the man. It is also a way to masculinise the woman because the man rely on her like a child so he is the feminine part of the duo. When you start saying you want a provider ( at least in France ) men find you attractive but don’t step up. Because the fact that you are fighting for your feminity puts you also in a mode that is not very feminine. Women shoudn’t fight to be themselves but they have to. Women are like the Earth, totally damaged, polluted. they have a huge capacity of reconstruction in them but for that they need to be protected. Why men are not flipping the script ? the ego. To see that you have almost destroyed humanity is not a good feeling when you are supposed to be responsible for it. Women can feel as much as men are aware. We could feel that deep pain of having been abandoned and blossom again but for that men need to fully accept the situation.


    1. No. Sorry for your pain but society (& women) has told men that they are not needed, not wanted, and are disposable. So take responsibility for your own life and do not look for men to be your provide slaves.


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