“Mastery of the self is, really, the ultimate form of mastery.” – Robert Greene
Contents:
1.) Introduction
2.) Monk Mode Recap
3.) Consume Less, Produce More
4.) Enjoying Work
5.) Escape The Crab Bucket & Avoid Victim Mentality
6.) On Losers
7.) Quality Beats Quantity
8.) Applying Quality Over Quantity To Sales
9.) Loser’s Entitlement Mentality – Give It To Me Now!
10.) Don’t Take Advice From Losers & Victims
11.) In Closing / Relevant Reading
1.) Introduction:
When I wrote monk mode, my intent was to communicate on a practical level to losers “how to stop being a loser”. I used to be a loser, I personally devised and tested monk mode, and it helped me massively, so I shared my findings with others.
Now there is some controversy surrounding monk mode, mainly concerning “when one should use monk mode” and “if monk mode is being used by introverts as an excuse not to socialise”. Although I will address these questions and concerns eventually, they fall outside the purview of this article.
If you are broke and have no friends, your first port of call is not to make friends. It’s to get enough to discipline to master a hobby, and then flip this skill into making some money – this is monk mode. You can’t focus on others when you need to build yourself up from nothing. People who aren’t losers and rely on networking to do business don’t understand this, but monk mode was never written with them in mind – it was written for losers.
If you lack discipline, don’t have much going for yourself, and are distracted by nonsense social activities rather than building yourself, I highly recommend monk mode.
That being said, monk mode is not for everyone. Monk mode is life support for losers who need to prevent themselves from drowning in an abyss devoid of discipline, and dominated by depression. Monk mode is a route out of the gutters of hell, a long and winding path of redemption for the mediocre who’ve decided enough is enough.
So what’s the next step after Monk Mode? Let’s assume you have used monk mode, are no longer a complete loser, but still aren’t killing it in life. What key ingredient are you missing, what do you need to give you that extra edge? You need a champion’s mentality – this article will tell you how to get one, as well as demonstrate its attitude.
Champion mentality is about optimising your life and relationships so that you continuously win, improve and raise your value. Inevitably by merit of accomplishment and the achievement-based narcissism that accompanies it, such a lifestyle leads to a higher quality of life spiritually, socially and financially.
2.) Monk Mode Recap:
People who create are more interesting than people who don’t because they apply their essence to an art form. In doing this they add value to themselves, they are more developed human-beings and thus more interesting.
People who do nothing but consume are basic people who have no real value, most of their interests (and thus what they talk about) is vicarious and based on the achievement of others. Losers live through other people, winners live through themselves; losers invest in nothing, winners don’t stop investing. Winners invest in themselves before investing in others, losers are interested in everything, but have no actual value to invest.
So how does a loser stop losing? Minimise hobbies that are consumptive and acquire hobbies that are productive. It’s really that simple. Switch Netflix for reading, writing or coding. I’m not going to babysit you with examples and brainstorm a 100 different hobbies that are productive so you can lazily pick one you like the sound of. Part of being a winner is doing the mental legwork. However, if you’re ailed by the creative capacity of a damp towel, I will note some generalised examples to get you started: martial arts, musical instruments and languages.
Assess your life by looking at the activities you engage in. Now categorise which activities create value, and which feel good but don’t really enhance your value as a person. Now cut out/reduce the things in the consumption category, and replace these activities with those that build value.
3.) Consume Less, Produce More:
It’s funny average people blame the rich for their problems instead of becoming more like them – this is why they keep losing.
If you are poor and have no marketable skills or value, rather than waste time whining online about how 1%ers need taxing more to subsidise your pathetic existence, how do you take responsibility for yourself and become more like them? It’s incredibly simple:
Get a hobby, get good at it, monetise it, and as it scales up you will find yourself succeeding. All of a sudden you’re the winner who doesn’t want to be taxed more, rather than the loser expecting the state to steal from the rich for you.
If you don’t have your own business, you don’t have as much freedom as somebody who does. You probably don’t enjoy what you do either. Some people enjoy their jobs, but this is besides the point. You don’t get rich on a salary, you get rich by having a successful business idea and scaling it up. It’s not the only way to get rich, but it’s the most common way.
Developing a hobby for X number of years, and then monetising it into a product or service once you’re competent is how businesses are built and rat races are escaped.
If you don’t spend your spare time developing a skill that you can master enough to monetise, you won’t start a business and thus you’ll always be massaging another man’s balls for a living.
Taking a monthly salary from another man is horrible. When you make another man rich, you are undervalued and only one person pays you. When you make yourself rich, you get what you’re worth and hundreds or even thousands of people are paying you by buying your product or service. If you are in the prior category you’re a slave, if you’re in the latter you’re a free man.
Common sense isn’t common because average people never got the memo. When you read the words on this page, intuitively it will sound like common sense that should go without saying. I should be preaching to the choir and in doing so stating the obvious and making myself look like a resounding idiot.
And yet, if people actually applied this wisdom, we’d have more winners than losers in this life. Most people you pass on a day-to-day basis are losers. They are everywhere, it’s an epidemic!
What do you think they do when they get home? Sit down, watch Netflix, bash one out and laze around being mediocre. They piss all their time away on nonsense, but then believe the reason they’re failing at life is because they’re unlucky – pathetic!
They are losers because they don’t invest in themselves, it’s that simple.
Hobbies where you consume rather than produce are junk hobbies, much like pizza and red bull they should be used in moderation.
– Gaming? Consuming
– Shopping? Consuming
– Baking? Producing
– Writing? Producing
This doesn’t mean never game, shop or have fun. Basic binary thinkers miss the point and think all this focus on self-improvement and productivity is advocating a boring type A personality that never has fun. It isn’t. It means if you want to be a winner, you have to do consumptive things far less than productive things. Make this a habit and a way of life, and you will see both your quality of life and bank balance rise. It’s this simple, yet most find it difficult to achieve.
To apply the Pareto principle to having fun, 80% of your time should be spent on producing, whilst 20% is spent on consumption.
As a bonus, when you actually become good at the thing you produce you will have fun doing it. This allows you to have fun and produce simultaneously!
4.) Enjoying Work:
Losers without any skills need to consume to have fun because they lack the value necessary to enjoy life without indulging in someone else’s value.
A talented coder for instance has his own value, when he “works” on an app, he has a lot of fun doing it despite the challenge it represents. He can work and have fun at the same time, this is the hallmark of a winner, losers can’t do this so they don’t understand it.
Whilst a loser could never conceive of the fun inherent to producing (to a loser, all work is equally soul-crushing), winners know exactly what I’m talking about – work can be fun!
Work stops being work when you love what you do and you’re good at it. This is why it pays dividends in happiness and general quality of life to monetise a hobby. There’s no point being rich if you’re too miserable to enjoy it.
There’s no point to money you can’t enjoy, so if you want to be rich and happy – achieving it via a hobby is the way to go. Become an expert pianist, fighter, writer or whatever.
When you find something you absolutely love, you work hard without feeling exhausted from the undertaking. You enjoy your work so much that your work does not feel like work, it feels like something you’d do anyway, but just so happen to get paid for.
Because your work is a hobby you’ve monetised, you will work hard and not feel like you’re working, which means low stress, high happiness and a well fed wallet. For people with the necessary work ethic, this is highly attainable. To losers it sounds like a myth, because they can’t imagine a life that doesn’t consist of being miserable.
5.) Escape The Crab Bucket & Avoid Victim Mentality:
If you’re born in a crab bucket, the first thing you must do is escape and seek lessons from winners. To losers nothing’s their fault, they rationalise their inferiority by shifting blame to those they’re jealous of, they’re pathetic. Losers are socialists and people who think the world owes them something. Nothing is their fault, everything bad that happens to these people is the fault of people more successful than them, these people must be avoided at all costs.
The thing that keeps people poor the most is other poor people filling their minds with shit, you must detach. If you’re born to losers they teach you how to be a loser, not a winner. You must detach and reprogram yourself.
Losers keep you down with misinformation, then when by your own defiance you make it out, they try to take the credit for your successes. Pathetic! The very people who hold you back are the same people who want you to “remember them when you make it”. The people who doubt you are the same people who have their hand out when you make it, they are disloyal, pathetic and do not belong in your life.
If you were born a loser, were surrounded by losers and made it out, it isn’t the losers that got you out, it was you. You don’t owe them a cent.
Losers always try to guilt trip you, because if you are foolish enough to fall for it, they can pillage you.
Losers complain “once he made it he forgot about us and never came back, he betrayed his roots!”
Why did he do that? Because associating with losers is dumb, the people saying this will try to drag him down once he’s made it, and it’s his awareness of this that prevents him from continued association. Of course being the losers that they are, these people are completely ignorant to this, they just think the escaped crab is an asshole. Let them think that, for their opinions are as worthless as they are.
6.) On Losers:
Poverty is just turning the difficulty up on the game, you know why the poor stay poor? Scarcity mindset. The truly worthy always get what they deserve, but plenty of people get less than they feel they deserve, do you know why?
Because they’re not Machiavellian enough.
Those illiterate in matters of power idiotically work hard for another man their entire lives, so all they have to show for their effort when the curtain calls is a mountain of debt. This is incredibly sad, and is not the mark of a life well lived.
If you work hard but not intelligently, you can still be broke. Clever people don’t just work hard, they also work intelligently. They know they need to work for themselves as soon as they can, and that working for somebody else is just a means to an end until that time comes. Rather than rest on their laurels, they develop a skill in their “spare” time and have it monetised by yesterday!
Losers see your ambition and they shit on it because they have a scarcity mindset, people in a state of scarcity are excessively selfish and have no capacity to be magnanimous. Losers seek obstacles (why something isn’t possible), whilst winners seek solutions (how can I achieve this?)
Edgy losers are the funniest, they have the energy to “call bullshit” but don’t direct that energy into elevating themselves. Being angry doesn’t make you respectable, powerful or a winner, if you don’t channel your anger correctly you’re just an idiot other people laugh at.
Anger is a powerful emotion, winners channel it into productive endeavours, losers squander it like they do everything and use it to bicker with irrelevant people on social media.
Losers take more because they need more. Wherever a loser is and whatever he’s doing, he takes more than he gives if he even gives at all. The loser is a needy personality, he always wants help, be it emotional or financial. Losers are not self-sufficient and don’t even try to be, they are perpetual children. Women are more comfortable being losers than men as they more easily internalise a victim mentality, but it is prevalent to both sexes and is attractive in neither.
Winners surround themselves with superiors so they can up their game, losers surround themselves with inferiors so they can pad their ego. Why do losers become and stay losers? Because once they internalise they’re oppressed and that nothing’s their fault, it’s more comfortable for them to blame reality for their shortcomings instead of humbling up, realising they aren’t squat, and doing something about it.
This is another thing about losers, they don’t move towards pain and struggle in order to improve themselves, they indulge in comfort, this is why they are weak.
It’s easier to internalise your inferiority and blame your appointed enemy for your mediocrity than to introspect, improve and compete.
Only people with skill actually like meritocracy because they have a chance of winning. Unremarkable people want handouts, they don’t want to compete. Of course if you had a bad start in life you will have to deprogram a lot of the nonsense you were taught, but it’s better to bloom late than never at all.
7.) Quality Beats Quantity:
Want to bypass the mediocre majority? Most people are quantity focused, so do the opposite and be quality focused.
This entire blog is built on this mantra, quality over quantity. I get more views, more followers and more money than people who have been doing this longer than I have because my focus is always on quality, never on quantity.
If you copy other people or produce content for the sake of producing it, you will never amount to much. Why will somebody settle for an imitation when they can get the original? You are basically broadcasting you’re a bootleg imitator when you do this. People are not blind, you may think you’re clever, but it is foolish to underestimate the intelligence of your readers.
Why would somebody read your nonsense when there are tens of thousands of publications vying for their attention? If you want people to read you, you have to be worth reading – this means being as original as possible and saying something because you have something to say, rather than saying something because you feel you must to remain relevant and seen.
I have never written an essay for the sake of writing it, I write because I have something to say. I genuinely love writing and sharing my ideas, writing is not a secondary objective to me, it’s the primary objective.
Ask any regular reader what they think of this blog, they will affirm I may not post as much as others, but that generally speaking my content is superior to everything else they come across, if not equal to it. Whatever I do turns to gold, otherwise I don’t bother doing it.
Whilst other people think they’re better than you because they outdo you in volume, you and anybody with an eye for quality knows you’re superior because you outdo them in quality. I use writing as an example because it’s what I do, but you can apply this to anything.
8.) Applying Quality Over Quantity To Sales:
The counterargument I often hear as to why quantity beats quality is “more sales is better than less sales as you’ll make more money”.
People who think this are obvious small fish, they must need to make numerous low ticket sales to masses of mediocre people because they’re thinking like lemonade stand owners!
The quality over quantity mantra applied to sales is simple, it is better for you to have one big contract or one big client (quality) than it is to have ten average or mediocre clients. Having more clients at a lower rate means more stress and work for less money. Even if the cumulative sum is higher for ten average clients than one good client, get two good clients and you’re still doing less work and earning more than you would from ten average clients. Winners optimise their time, losers squander it.
Losers will tell you that you need to get as many clients as possible and rush them in and out so you can move on to the next one, winners will tell you that you need to find the right clients and do your very best for them.
Quality over quantity does not mean “just the one, just the best” it means “only work with quality, cultivate quality and focus on quality.” If you want to be the best or be considered the best, you have to obsess over quality. Kim Kardashian for example may be very popular with losers, but nobody considers her the best at anything because she is utterly talentless.
Aim for superiority in all things, combine the best product with a network consisting of nothing but the best people. Again, quality over quantity does not mean “I cannot sell the best product to as many people as possible” this is stupid. If you have the best product, anybody that can afford it will buy it because it will be popular.
For example with writing, it’s better for you to have one good book than five mediocre ones. My book isn’t even out yet and I’ve been writing for two and a half years. There are third-rate writers who have three books out in twelve months that make less than I do from Patreon on all their books combined. Hilarious, yet somewhat sad. I’m not going out of my way to ridicule anyone here, but I want my point to hit home as profoundly as possible: quality always trumps quantity.
One really good book can make more money than five crappy uninspiring books. Better to have your readers chomping at the bit for your book to come out, than releasing something for an unpacked theatre.
I am convinced being focused on quantity rather than quality is the path to mediocrity, and that greatness lies in innovation and the pursuit of the apex.
I apply this mantra to everything, I desire the best form, not the most reps and the best friends rather than the most friends.
Losers prefer to do a lot of mediocre things and call it success, rather than do one thing really well and become an expert at it. If you ask someone “what are you good at?” and they don’t have an answer, the answer is nothing. Because someone who doesn’t know what they’re good at has not obsessed enough in any one area to discover themselves and foster mastery – they are mediocre.
9.) Loser’s Entitlement Mentality – Give It To Me Now!:
People want to be on top the instant they set their mind to something, but progression is incremental, not exponential. People who consume copiously without counterbalancing via creation tend to be boring.
Low value people take value from others and do not build value. High value people give value to others and are constantly building it. People who pretend to be busy are low value, because if they were high value they’d actually be busy producing something.
If someone is expecting instant quick and effortless change, I already know they’re a loser. That’s not how life works. Marketing targets losers with bullshit promises of “easy, instant results” because it plays to the fantasy that greatness isn’t a matter of skill and dedication, but rather something that is monopolised and can be bought. It cannot, and this is false.
The only thing such marketing achieves is the monetisation of losers to the profit a private company, it does not stop losers from losing. If the advice on this blog was disseminated on TV, half of these companies would stop making money, especially sectors like the fitness industry.
Why is this? Because only losers buy into false promises and pump money into gimmicky equipment that promises to make your workout easier, these are the same people who pay for gym subscriptions they don’t even use – losers!
The fitness industry is entirely dependent on the finance of losers to remain profitable, it’s hilarious, yet somewhat sad to see a section of the economy operate in this manner.
Winners get more for less money because they have the work ethic, dedication and subsequent skill that comes from this not to fall for the bogus promises of flashy, bottom-feeding salesmen.
10.) Don’t Take Advice From Losers & Victims:
Reality is politically incorrect, winners embrace this, losers don’t; sensibility is an expensive prison. Sensitive people tell you one thing straight from the get go without even intending to: they’re losers. Avoid sensitive people, not only do you have to waste energy watching what you do and don’t say, but seeing as they’re losers they have less to offer you.
Losers don’t have any form of narcissistic supply other than “giving advice”, their “advice” is terrible, ignore all of it. The people whose advice you really want aren’t lining up to give it to you, those who are lining up are losers nine out of ten times.
Losers have no achievements to get high off because they haven’t achieved anything, so their way of feeling big is misinforming you with nonsense they pulled out of their ass. They achieve this by telling you how to live your life when they’re not even on top of their own.
Whiners don’t want to win they just want to be pitied, pity is pathetic. Nobody worth a damn identifies as a loser even if they come from garbage. The more you try to talk sense to somebody determined to be a victim, the more they dig their heels in about how unfair life is. Pathetic.
Anybody who has read this blog has probably deduced I have the capacity to be dangerous if I wanted to be. But instead of endeavouring to destroy people, I don’t, I help them instead.
I’m about contributing to the world, adding value, and ultimately as a higher goal: rebuilding the masculinity of western civilization brick by brick.
I have a goal higher than myself, which means I go further in providing for today’s men than the companies who don’t care but are just looking to make a buck by exploiting masculine insecurities (height, dick size, earnings etc.) Winners need a goal higher than themselves. You don’t become great if you can’t see past yourself. You should be selfish, and you should seek to better yourself, but once you have momentum do not limit yourself to greed, have a higher goal, preferably something noble, and you will excel more than those motivated solely by money.
Winners have a positive mentality and wish to create, losers have a negative mentality and wish to destroy.
My life is proof to me you can have absolutely fuck all and nobody there for you and still become a winner. I’ve had to overcome more than most to get where I am, and this is why I don’t have time for whiners. You can whine all you like about patriarchy or white privilege, but this is all fake nonsense. People who whine about this fiction do so because they have no real hardships to complain of. People who’ve actually had to endure hardship recognise the people who whine about these things for the phonies that they are.
I’ve been a loser, I grew up with nothing and nobody. Nobody gave a shit about me growing up, virtually nobody. I didn’t become the man I am today because I had an easy life, I forged myself from a crucible of both spiritual and material deprivation.
I’ve been homeless, I’ve slept in a park under a tree in the rain because I had nowhere to go. I was in care as a kid and I’ve never known my father. By this description I should be a snivelling loser, a weakling, somebody going nowhere, a crumbled and torn piece of paper tumbling in the winds of an icy English street, and yet I’m stronger than almost everybody I meet. I’m strong enough to announce this on a website read by hundreds of thousands and not give a crap if anybody tries to use it against me.
I don’t milk the misfortunes life handed me to monetise people’s pity, because I’m not a loser. I don’t need people’s pity to get ahead, I can get ahead on my own merit, and this is what I encourage others to do. I got where I am in life by providing value, not by selling a sob story. Follow this example, be a winner, be someone worth something, there is no dignity nor honour in monetising misfortune.
I know how to help the helpless because I’ve been helpless.
Now you know part of my story, you know why I’m emotionally invested in helping men. I had a tough life devoid of guidance, I now offer what I never had to those afflicted by these very maladies.
11.) In Closing / Relevant Reading:
Stand on your own two feet and take life by the balls, expecting good things to happen because you want them to is how a loser thinks, winners make it happen. If neither sex nor dignity inspires you to improve, fear of our impending civilizational collapse should do the trick.
People can help you for money, and you can read these blogs as much as you like, but people can’t fill the void that is a non-existent work ethic. If you think you’re a loser, you are. Don’t wish for a better life, make one.
Book(s):
Blog:
“Winners have a positive mentality and wish to create, losers have a negative mentality and wish to destroy.”
Creation is hard destruction is easy. One puts man at his higher self. Theother lower.
Destruction is quick and easy, creation is slow and difficult. Most take the path of least resistance, they’re losers.
Ever take a look at rent control? And tenant´s rights issues? They both tend to be about people who are renting seeking to obtain property rights in real estate they do not own, which results in the property owners losing their hedge against inflation, as their tenants gain a shelter against inflation. It is the shifting of property rights, minus the responsibilities, from the owners to the tenants, under the guise that property owners are greedy, and tenants are of an altruistic breed, who are selflessly looking after the rights of the elderly and minorities. And, if you look at the weekly rags that tend to be staunchly pro-tenant, you will see that they take on plenty of advertisers who are seeking plenty of ways for tenants to dispose of their income, in bars, restaurants, clubbing, marijuana, massage parlors, the idea being to let the property owners work hard and save in order to invest, but you go out and enjoy spending what little you make, oh, and don´t forget to max out those credit cards, cause as long as you can make the minimum monthly payment, then you are entitled to enjoy it!
A small detail: the Pareto principle is actually different to what you’ve written above, it is with regard to cause and effect, 20% of your exercises will result in 80% of your mass gains, for example.
Right. I’m not using the principle verbatim, but referencing the simple idea of “80/20” in time distribution.
I should say, an excellent article anyway. You and WSP are some of the only people on the internet whose words I would trust.
WSP is a great blog and it’s not even their main gig, just a side project. A true testament to their skill and capability.
Their content is worth more than those Motivational seminar scams.
WSP?
He is referring to Wallstreet Playboys – wallstreetplayboys.com
Thank you.
Seems like another man found his purpose in life, GJ. Im still searching….
U are truly inspirational.
Thank you!
Just a hint: Simply finding something interesting for starters will suffice. You don’t have to go “omg this is so amazing the time is flying by when I do this” from the very first days or even months of doing it.
An easier way to detect it is if you’re mindful enough to pay attention to your daydreaming and notice yourself increasing the frequency of your mind bringing that activity up, even for a few seconds. I feel that noticing the thoughts that rise from the subconscious is the same as noticing someone else’s talk. Like when you read these words.
Fantastic post. When you think deep you see that it’s all about mindset. Trump says “You have think like a winner to win.” (If anyone wants to learn about this mindset, should read “How Rich People Think” book.)
I am learning a lot from this blog. Thanks!
Sounds like an interesting book. Will have to check that out. Thanks for the recommendation!
Going through real hardships (homelessness, neglect, poverty etc) is one of the most transformative things… if you get out alive. It’s strange because those lessons are the most valuable. They help you transcend into pastures yet known.
Almost every actualized person I’ve read about had the single common factor of coming from a point of despair… they almost cracked. Every time. That was the moment where the stars aligned and they were told what to do.
Whilst I have been fortunate to come from a loving family (always had a roof), the hyper-reality of “do or die” situations limits how much shit can get to you. In time, this serves you.
As any “winner” will tell you – the path is sticking to something tenaciously, assiduously, until either you or Fate blinks. You blink, you die; if Fate blinks, the door unlocks. The next plateau awaits. Winners call this “opportunity”, losers “luck”.
Going through troubles is the way you achieve the focus necessary to pull it off. Only when you refuse to give in will you be able to hold your nerve long enough for it to succeed. It may take years.
Great comment here John, I agree with everything you’ve said. Very well said!
I notice that a lot of people who live in million dollar homes in exclusive neighborhoods tend to wash their beaters in their drive ways on weekends, while a lot of losers are driving the latest model luxury sportscars, which they lease, and which they will pay to have washed, waxed, and detailed. The millionaires, by the way, are economizing, and investing their money in assets, while the guys cruising around in showy sportscars are deep in consumer debt, but believe that as long as they can make that monthly minimum payment, then it is all affordable, and all is well.
I continue to see results by living and breathing your philosophy. It’s taking me to new levels
Mustard mate, reading this actually woke me up a bit more to certain negative people in my life at the moment. Positive vibes.
There are plenty of people out there, whom if you took the time to try to give them a hand up, they would use that opportunity to try to pull you down, and they would think it the funniest thing in the world. There are plenty of people who do not want to see others get ahead of them, and they have no intention of getting anywhere themselves.
Deep. I appreciate the length, style and quality of your articles!
Thanks!
This was a great and honest piece brother. Great to read a small fraction of your story.
I don’t think anyone who has had an easy life can become truly strong. Diamonds are formed when you compress carbon under immense pressure and what comes out is one of the strongest materials known to man.
You learn more from losses than you do wins, and for this reason I’m more likely to listen to those who have gambled and lost over those who have never gambled at all. You can live an entire life and never once step up to the table.
Some of your thoughts in this essay are almost karmic in nature, the circle of a loser and the circle of a winner are decided based on in which direction they apply their effort. A loser applies it to the production of others, where a winner applies it to the production of self.
Losers make their mistake in that they never understand that you cannot withdraw more than you put in over time. This makes you a net drain on a macro and a micro scale, and will cause society to eventually cast you aside and your friends to desert you. People will only carry you if they see future potential, and their perceptions may quickly change.
Question, when you talk about a hobby that you can monetize, this seems a little odd to me considering most creative hobbies are very hard to monetize. What do you think of this? Say, taking a creative hobby such as making music which would probably take years before you can make a single cent. You even suggest martial arts, which is more of a money-siphon than anything you’d get to make money out of.
I know there are other hobbies such as language that are easier to translate into a higher paying job. But what do you think about the ones that don’t (usually artistic ones)? What’s their use in self-development and how important would you consider them to someone trying to improve?
I always figured this would be the last thing that a person would need to focus on if they are trying to get out of a rut.
You can teach any skill you have to anybody who is at a lower level of competency at that skill than you are.
You don’t need to be a master to teach something, although if you are you’ll make more than someone who isn’t.
If you get into baking, you can start making cakes and selling them within 1-3 yrs.
If you learn piano, you can teach it as a private tutor, or get paid to perform if you’re good enough/business smart with your social media. How slow/quick you learn depends on your intelligence/hand-to-eye. If something is going to take you 7 years to be any good at it, it’s obviously not a monetisable hobby for you.
Computer coding languages are the easiest to monetise. Easy in that they easily transfer as a marketable skill, not easy to learn and use – it takes a lot of skill to code and code well.
Sure if you’re into painting model trains it’s not going to yield the same kind of money as learning to bake cakes and slowly moving up to wedding cakes (where the big money is), but if you’re getting into something with the goal to eventually monetise it, you consider this beforehand. Common sense and business savvy go along way. I did not claim all hobbies are equally easily monetised and it would be silly to assume this is what’s being stated!
I did not mean to imply that hobbies are equally easily monetized, the question i meant to make was: Do you think that hobbies which are not easily monetized hold any value and what kind of value?
I’m asking this for myself because I’m only interested in hobbies relating to creating art on my PC, and i have this feeling that it would be unrealistic to go into them expecting to make any significant amount of money. I feel like i should only think of any possible money that may come from them as an unexpected benefit which will probably not happen in less than 3 years.
If you enjoy it, it’s valuable to you because it makes you happy. It won’t make you rich unless you become elite at it (think top 1%) but it’s better than spending your time watching TV or doing some other junk. To be honest, I think although some hobbies are more easily monetised than others, the internet has made otherwise difficult to monetise hobbies easy to monetise.
For example, this article was free for you to read, but I got paid for writing it by a fraction of my readers who sponsor my work. Without the internet and Patreon, I wouldn’t have been paid for producing this. In the old days, I’d have needed to get approved by a publisher and got a book deal – so bear this in mind, barriers to entry for monetisation are not static, and the internet has made monetisation a lot easier!
I’ve actually seen digital artists rake in insane amounts of money on Patreon, people love their art so they pay them to keep making it. Usually the artist rewards them with prints/different models/PSD files/exclusive pieces or whatever the more they donate. You should look into it.
I’ve seen people making $20,000 a month on Patreon from doing exactly what you just said and believe to be difficult to monetise. Obviously 20k is at the higher end, I doubt it’s representative, but it’s proof you can make good money from a hobby if you’re really good at it! Even something like painting/digital illustration!
Patreon (http://patreon.com/) is a great platform for monetising your hobby, and building a platform to promote it online. From a writer to an artist, I highly recommend you check it out. Don’t give up on your dream.
-IM
Thanks a bunch your words are very inspiring. Have you seen musical artists do anything similar on Patreon? The way you frame digital art on Patreon gives me some really good perspective on what to aim for if i go down that path, but I’m clueless about music production, because even though i know artist release stuff on bandcamp to make money and the like i have not the slightest idea on how much $ the artists that i like are making.
Cool article with many valid points. My problem with your ideology is that you fail to recognize the outside factors that affect people. You would do well to read the book “The Myth of Individualism” by Peter Carello. You are as solipsistic as a female when it comes to recognizing that people have other problems limiting their social mobility rather than lack of discipline or work ethic. You also have the capitalist douchebag tendency of casting all rich people in a desirable light. There is a distinct difference between a person gaining their wealth through developing a hobby and discipline as opposed to the bastards eating from the “invisible hand” of the stock market or exploiting people who can’t protect themselves (like in many foreign lands). Also, many people would much rather rather be a ‘loser” with family and friends who genuinely care for them than a rich asshole who people only associate with because of their wealth.
How do you not realize that these “losers” you speak of are often victims to capitalism more than beneficiaries? Surely a so-called logical person could see that 1. the alienation of labor, 2. Disproportionate wealth inequality ratio, and 3. Privatization of resources and services every human being needs to survive (food,water, education, healthcare) that come with your beloved capitalism would result in a bunch of people lacking in opportunity, attention, and of course discipline? Maybe If you spent more time examining the arguments of Marx and Engels instead of blindly bashing all aspects of socialism, you’d actually understand why most people don’t have a “champions mentality.”
This is the same sociology major you blocked on twitter cause you were too lazy or ashamed to respond to my criticisms of capitalism and your elitist ideologies. I’m always gonna be a fan because your writing is genius and I genuinely learned a lot from you, just funny to me the “Illimitable Man” can’t fight logic with logic lmao. Keep up the good work chap, still welcome to debate me if you aren’t too much of a “cuck” (love that word btw).
Was he really bashing on these, as you put it, aspects of socialism? To me, it sounds like he was bashing on the people that make it a point to stay there, and make it a point with their defeatist mentality to tell everyone in a similar position that they are as stuck as them and that nothing will ever change that, focusing on how hard they have it rather than on how to improve their situation.
Sounds like someone has a crush!
Production by a single individual outside of society is as much of an absurdity as the development of language without individuals speaking and talking to each other”- Karl Marx
I think I was a little harsh on him at first and now I see that he is maybe trying to empower the people socialism seeks to help, but it wont happen by them getting a champions mentality
not with that attitude…
Well,
I believe you misunderstood IM as he clearly told us to be proletarian : “Low value people take value from others and do not build value. High value people give value to others and are constantly building it.”. This seems deeply Marxist to me. Anyway communism was not intended for whining “losers”. It was the exact opposit : a 19th century 60h/week miner on strike had a very dangerous but very monetizing hobby.
I think the problem is that nowadays “socialism” has been robed by the middle class to save their privileges.
Visit some of those foreign lands where the rich are supposedly exploiting the poor, and you are very likely to see that when the income level rises abroad, you will run into dozens of women´s shoe stores, accessory stores, jewelry stores, clothing stores, and sportswear stores, and underwear stores, before you run into one supermarket. And, before you run into that supermarket, you will pass plenty of bars and restaurants. If the poor invested their money instead of consuming it, they would not be so poor. There are plenty of rich people in poor countries, they are the ones who look for opportunities to make money, and then they make the effort to make that money. There are also plenty of people who look for excuses for the poor, say, those who would try to convince you that foreign donor organizations are needed to provide funds, so that local people will be better able to remove rotting, fly invested mangos out of their own backyards, but until that day, flies will simply be free to spread disease..
Blaming capitalism, how original.
Nobody owes you fucking shit. If this was ancient time, you’d be out there hunting for food, water and sex, so get the fuck out of your own bubble of modern complacency and work instead of blaming the world for “not giving you the basic resources”.
I like your style and IM is becoming one of my favorite blogs to read. I also believe in the quality over quantity mantra and apply it to my skill set.
When I was younger(around 22), I realized that something was missing in my life. I had been deprived of some great masculine quality and how was I to lay hold of it?
I needed to get beat up.
I had only been in one fight my entire time in high school and it landed me in juvenile because of the zero tolerance policy in my public school system. This was all for standing up for someone else being bullied by a bigger guy.
Anyway I was missing something to become a man. I wanted to know what I was made of and also I was afraid of fighting. Not because of the pain but because of social reasons and the fact that as an introvert….being bold took much more effort.
When this hit me I knew that because I was so afraid I HAD to do it. I had to start training in some fighting art and I had to experience combat. Around this time I was a bouncer at a particularly rough bar and within two weeks of working there I had a beer bottle busted over my head needing 12 stitches.
I was a big guy from lifting and doing some steroids but that was all I had. I decided that I was no longer going to just have the bar room bluff and actually get down and dirty. I am sure that the nature of this particular bar also compelled me.
I started training in Shaolin Five Animals Kung Fu and found I enjoyed it so much that it began to consume me. I started getting very curious and eventually started using what I learned on miscreants at the bar I worked at. I thought of it as kind of an experiment.
Well it turns out the shit works and I seriously fucked some assholes up. One particular time and the biggest fight I had ever been in at the time was against a guy who was on some kind of drug like PCP. I would hit him and he would be knocked down and get right back up still wanting more. After two knockdowns I turned around to go back inside and the guy comes at me again. This time I ended up having him in a school yard headlock just pummeling him with the other hand and he goes down into the fetal position and I continue to absolutely wail on this dude’s cranium.
Finally I am getting tired and asking myself “What the fuck am I gonna have to kill this guy?”. I turn to walk away and this motherfucker gets up AGAIN bloody as fuck and says “I’m not done yet”.
So I blasted him with a leg kick and he was visibly hurt but still standing all maimed and bloody. I had a white t-shirt covered in his blood. Finally I walk back inside and we lock the door. Few seconds later I hear a very loud BOOM…….this dude got in his car and tried to ram it through the fucking building!!
So that was my first big fight after serious training and I beat the ever loving shit out of this guy on PCP and he was not small either..maybe 220 and 5’11.
A year after training in kung fu and getting to brown sash I joined a Mixed Martial Arts gym that had fighters and even more serious training. Within a year I had my first MMA fight and it was so fucking epic that it changed my life. I will tell that story another time but I ended up becoming a pro fighter and coach as well(which I still am). My career ended from too many injuries racked up in training on a shoulder and then dislocating it in a fight….one which I was again seriously beating the fuck out of the guy. My record is 6-2 including that loss due to shoulder dislocation. My only legit loss, which I lost in the last round was due to exhaustion and over training and only 2 minutes to go I was also up on the cards ..that guy is now in the UFC.
I say this because I am thinking of beginning the journey of writing and perhaps start my own blog about fighting/martial arts and general mind set principles that I learned from training and fighting. I also want to include other red pill topics and general self improvement for men.
I too want to help bring masculinity back to males. No one helped me. I had to slog through the countless hours of training, repetition and endless pain in my body to keep myself in fight shape. I wanted it so bad that when my first MMA fight came I viewed it as a fight for survival and I made the mental decision that I was willing to put my life on the line. This made me fight like a fucking ANIMAL.
This post was inspiring because I know what it is like to be a loser. I also know what it is like to rise out of the shit pile of mediocrity and truly master something. What this does to one’s confidence is not understood by anyone lacking mastery in some art or discipline.
I have monetized my skill set by being a coach but I am thinking more in terms of myself now and how I can build it up for me without working for someone else. I could try marketing private lessons on my own or doing something along those lines. I have the gears churning but unclear on exact direction. I am definitely going to start my own blog and have several ideas on the name and general tone.
Although Roussea never did actually use the term “Noble Savage”, I was thinking of incorporating this into the direction of the blog. Helping make civilized men more savage in ways and yet more noble.
Western civilization and the males in particular need this shit.
Oh do shut up.
Me being called out all of the time as being a loser is very tiring because I am well aware that I’m a loser. My breath stanks, my eyes are too close together. I lost my father due to a vehicle accident when I was seven. My grandfather on my mother side blew out his brains when I was eight. My other grand father was an alcoholic bootlegger. My stepfather was a hardcore macho man that didn’t give a double damn about his stepchildren . I’ve had cancer, severe depression and oh yeah I was molested several times by a older cousin that I looked up to after my father die. So poor pitiful me stuck in the crab bucket but never pull others back in because I’m glad to see them escape this living Hell. I’ll even let them step on me to give them a boost to get out of the bucket. They don’t ever look back and I don’t expect them too. I’m beta or worse and expect to stay that way till the day I died. I don’t hate I just don’t give a flying fuck anymore. If you don’t have loser you can’t have winners. Signed The LOSER
I’m a loser as you’ve described. However, I’ve now begun the slow but steady transformation needed to be a winner. It’s going to be tough as fuck but I can’t stand the state of my current life. I’ve decided that I need to start training in a martial art. Not only for the physical benefits but mainly for the self-discipline and confidence that one may gain from it. Also, I’m slowly learning how to program in C because I’ve always loved computers and love learning how the work.
Like I said, it’s going to be slow as fuck but I have no choice. I want to let loose the winner that I’ve locked up inside. Thank you for this post and site. I love the quality of the posts and I wish you well.
Thank you. I wish you luck. Remember one thing on your journey: success is progressive, but not linear. You will have setbacks, but if you persist you will grow. Not growing is impossible when you’re actually trying.
Also in setbacks you learn a tonne of stuff impossible to learn any other way. This stuff is much bigger and different to any uni degree you can do. Entrepreneurs learn on the street.
More fiber in your diet! Let loose that winner you have locked up inside you. It’ll be big as fuck.
Great article. Great message. Much love from Ireland
Thank you. I leave your posts feeling motivated and capable of accomplishing greatness.
Great, great article.
I am a loser, I was born among losers. I still managed to get into engineering but I want so much more.
I’ve been thinking a lot about pleasure and happiness for the past few months. I have always played video games and consumed porn and movies a LOT. But recently I realized something : those things does not offer me anything, not even pleasure. They do not produce any value and I don’t even enjoy doing those. When I jerk off to porn compulsively, it’s not fun : it’s sad. It’s sad because of my motivations behind doing it: I hadn’t had sex in 2 years and I’m desperate for human contact. Same with video games: I play those because of the intense boredom I feel every day. Those are compulsive behaviors which acts as stimulations which numbs me from my mediocre life.
I’ve realized boredom is the root of a lot of those issues. Because I live such a dull life, I binge on hyper stimulations. Then, I’m tired and without energy. I also develop harmful habits. As a consequence, I do nothing interesting, which leads to even more boredom.
So I picked up some books, cleaned my room, began working out. It was awful at first but I read something on your blog once which was something like “presence is the key to success because when you are present you can apply self discipline while when you are absorbed and going with the flow you have no control”. So I began being present while lifting and I realized that the action of lifting gives me pleasure! Reading, working out or even cooking and cleaning my room gives me more short term pleasure than jerking off or playing video games. I’ve always thought I had such a hard time not playing video games because I was getting such an amazing short term reward but that’s simply not true. Those kind of activities literally brings nothing to the table.
This might seem irrelevant and common sense for anybody who is not a loser but I’ve been thinking about that for the past few days and it challenges everything I’ve based my lifestyle choices upon for my whole life.
Next step for me is to get a 6 pack. That’s something I’ve been dreaming about since I was 12 but everybody always told it’s impossible because it’s too hard and that it doesn’t fit who I am. FUCK THAT. I already lost half of my fat and I feel so much prouder and better. When I get up in the morning, I get happy instead of more depressed when I look myself in the mirror.
Did you get 6 packs?
Why spend cash or waste time finding a self-help book(s) online that resonates with you the most, when you have straight advice like this.
Other users that are looking for additional reading if they have a curiosity to sate would be Rationality: From AI to Zombies (https://intelligence.org/rationality-ai-zombies/). An intriguing read for those that wish to develop their RP toolbox further, and a way to further develop their own philosophy. And if that doesn’t interest you, it’s a good book to keep you intellectually sharp.
As an aside IM, what do you think of the idea for an individual to first develop and build their own philosophy? I feel that monk mode or improving one’s excellence as an individual first requires one to have a framework on life to call upon in times of adversity. This is all the more important for those that feel they are losers because – let’s face it – adversity will be a shadow that cripples, grapples, and pulls you away at every waking conscious moment for many days, months, and years ahead.
The temptation to lie in bed after the alarm has rung, to shut it off, and snuggle away for the next 2 hours instead of overcoming the feelings of dread from the day ahead, to maintaining productive behaviour throughout the day, delaying gratification at almost every lull in the work/monk days (especially in this distractive era full of infotainment on our ever accessible phones), the healthy habits to create and maintain and unhealthy ones to discard and abstain, only to once again, make that critical decision at the end of the day, to shut off electronics and internal lighting and go to bed lest we succumb in our tired and dazed consciousness and mindlessly waste time on the Internet or other consumptive behaviours.
This could even be extended on, nitpicking at gym, study, eating, sexual temptation, etc. A wall of text and all too appropriate for what the modern day loser has to face (be they male or female. Excellence is not gender-exclusive).
Stoic literature has been touched on a couple of times (at least, from my outdated info on the current state of affairs) and seems to be the most desirable for most secular RP users. I feel that as a preliminary to self-improvement/monk mode, this topic of philosophy such as Secular Buddhism or Stoicism maybe of interest for people that can’t sustain that process, and I personally believe is the last major key ingredient to be peeled and thrown into the slow cooker.
That is, if I haven’t missed anything important from my time away TRP.
“Why spend cash or waste time finding a self-help book(s) online that resonates with you the most, when you have straight advice like this.”
I know right?
IM’s posts are of better value than every single self help books I have ever read.
The main reason why I love IM’s articles is because he does not use useless words. It’s not like those BS self help books that needs 50 pages to get to the point because they use emotion-inducing sentences, BS feel good examples. Their reasoning is based on emotions and not on reason/demonstration. The reader gets an awesome emotional boost and feel great/motivated but few days after it’s gone and because the book doesn’t provide any real value it’s useless.
I can’t wait to hear your deep and manly voice on CMQ’s podcast btw <3
Well, you just explained why I’m so much into shows where the main character works hard until he achieves his dream, be sports or career.
Illimitable,
You should add “The Millionaire Fastlane” as a recommended reading alongside this article, as its COMPLETELY relevant to the theme of this article and developing a producer mindset. The author’s Fastlane Forum on the web is also a great resource for networking with other likeminded entrepreneurs and people who have or are trying to escape the “Slowlane” aka 9-5 massage another man’s balls lifestyle.
Fascinating. Have heard about this book before, but never read it. Can anybody else support crexstacle’s claims?
Yep. I’ve PMed you about it before. I need to re-read it to freshen up, I’m going a bit stale even though things are great financially.
Great essay as always, thanks for revealing a bit of your personal life. Gave me some extra motivation today to get back to boxing, just came home from a session. I will purchase your book for sure!
Like most people on this site I very much enjoy your work and appreciate all that you have given to the community. Your vast vocabulary and exceptional ability to put thoughts to paper are always compelling even when my opinion differs to yours on certain subjects. That being said, I was wondering if you would elaborate on the famous slogan in George Orwell’s 1984 “war is peace, freedom is slavery, ignorance is strength”. I understand that you are a busy man and will appreciate any thought that you have on this subject regardless of the written length. Anyone else in the comments is also welcome to share their thoughts as I am very interested in the type of opinion this community brings.
My thoughts on this :
was is peace -> to have peace one must be prepare for war
freedom is slavery -> one must first experience slavery to aspire to freedom
This is a great article and it really is the truth in all aspects. Its not wrong being born poor. The problem is staying poor. Its a reflection of your mindset!!!! And like you said in the article losers will always be poor cause they are so busy blaming others for their condition, when that time could be spent improving themselves and building themselves up.
The question is how much can someone transcend their environment without a high IQ that can self regulate and dispassionately examine their circumstances.
The majority seem to conform to their environment and are not equipped to do otherwise.
Toxic values > toxic policies > toxic neighborhoods > toxic communities > toxic families > toxic people
The bottom rung doesn’t seem to respond to shame or incentives, they have no reference of what if feels like to think differently. Shaming addicts doesn’t solve the problem. Most people are misery addicts; rehab helps more people then the few that can recover on their own after hitting a low point.
I’ve been focusing on the neighborhood level because 50 like minded people can still build something good on the edges of a broken system.
Personally I don’t think agree with your view with monk mode. Being a monk is about giving up attachments. That means no sex, no attachment to money, or society. It is even about increase your value. Many mgtow in monk mode are minimalist.
Monk MGTOW naturally usually have hobbies that end up improving themselves with knowledge , skills, etc. It may not necessary increase their value but that’s not their goal. Their goal is awareness and growth.
Thanks for this article IM 🙂 because allowed me to figure out that I need to go on Monk Mode.
Allow me to add Vince Lombardi (one of the greatest NFL coach of all times), Vince Lombardi’s words about how a Champion should be because your readers could benefit from ’em if they merged ’em with your article.
“People who create are more interesting than people who don’t because they apply their essence to an art form. In doing this they add value to themselves, they are more developed human-beings and thus more interesting.” Absolutely. Men were designed to be creators. I think at its core a large part of masculinity comes down to being a creator. In a way mirroring God if that makes sense.
Yes, the metaphor makes perfect sense.
This isn’t your first article to make me wonder what your thoughts are on Black Lives Matter and other SJW movements. Of course I don’t really have to ask.
Funny thing, I’ve been RP pill nearly 2yrs, but it took me well into yr 2 to really begin to grasp the concept of Neediness. It’s something I’ve had to and continue to examine regarding my own behavior. “The loser is a needy personality” is another great quote i can quickly internalize. I almost wish I could inform Trump’s protesters of this wisdom, but they’d just shot me anyways. Law #10-avoid infection!
The topic of binary/autistic linear thinking versus a Machiavellian’s nonlinear shrewd thinking is a topic I’d like to read more about, and if you have more to say about it I’d definitely appreciate it.
This is what you’re after:
http://illimitablemen.com/2015/02/08/machiavellian-thinking-vs-conventional-logic/
Thanks.
I must say all of your writing have been of immense impact to me and has made me see life from a whole new perspective. I’m a 21 year old Nigerian and an avid reader of your blog. I must say we have the most pathetic and inept set of leaders a country can have. Most people here see their shortcomings in life as the sole fault of the government. I’ve realized that the first step to emancipating myself from mediocrity is to take all the blame for whatever fate I’m dealt in life, makes me realize that the power to liberate an elevate myself lies solely in my hands. And I’m buying your book, no matter what the exchange rate says..lol
Say I’m a discount canned goods supplier to supermarkets. Wouldn’t I be the least interested in selling quantity? While quality over quantity applies to some things it won’t apply to everything. You’re writing that section as it was some sort of law of nature.
You won’t start a “discount canned goods supplier to supermarkets” business from nothing all by yourself, that might be a 2nd business you start with capital you already have access to. Quality is the best for starting out on your own. You won’t have business connections to stand out with so your quality of work will make you stand out.
Wow. This is the talking to I needed but no man ever gave me. Truly inspirational, IM.
I can vouch for this. The work I do and the hours I do make most people think I am nuts or they simply don’t believe me all the while watching movies, playing games going out drinking/partying or all the above while complaining about their work. I just made my 1st $15k/mnth, all self employed. I’m my own boss and things do have their ups and downs. I hardly watch any TV or movies and havn’t had an actual job in years.
I will say be careful on your chosen path and don’t delude yourself about the size of your market and strength of your competition. The most financially rewarding route is rarely what you actually want to do. Better off finding a niche or something no-one else wants to do vs wanting to be a musician for example just like every other guy. Keep your love as a hobby that you put effort into now and then. If you manage to get decent passive income from business efforts then pursue your love then.
Your own business from scratch is tough. We weren’t born equal and life wasn’t meant to be easy. You’ll be up against people that were bankrolled by rich parents etc. All you can do is play your hand and enjoy the challenge.
I needed this…the only content I’ve read so far that doesn’t sugar-coat the real issues.. i found the constant reference to the word “loser” as a bit rude but realized it’s the hard core truth.. because i’ve lived a life full of excuses and wondered why i wasn’t going anywhere ,and i really want to change ,if that means calling myself out on purposely being a loser and allowing myself to be comforted by white lies our loved ones tell us when they need to say it plain and simple that am being a loser.. Thank insert favorite deity for straight shooters..
This is exactly what I need. I love this blog already and I like the way you don’t sugarcoat anything to attract readers. It’s true there is a LOSER pandemic around and it’s really so sad. And the funny thing is nobody wants to take the effort to be a winner.
I’m subscribing right now cos you are so good and true. Thanks for the subtle art of not giving a fuck in your writing.
I am a machiavellian female reader and your advices, I find, are very useful for both males and females.
I am a narcissist with a tint of psychopathy and I find my apathy and lack of fear quite counter-productive. I do not know what I live for, because I see life as a meaningless game. I do appreciate the more simple pleasures of life, but I have potential for much more. People who empathise properly with others tend to have a compassion that drives them to act accordingly, they often have burning desires, fueled by their love for others (or their fear of being judged, or their feelings of guilt and responsibility). Non-empaths are incapable of this.
What motivates you to succeed? What is your reason?
What woman isn’t? Ha. Some women are cunning, but not very socially intelligent (eg: very low IQ) and thus cannot execute. Other women are smart and calculating, but don’t wish to hurt anybody and manipulate purely out of a self-preserving general distrust. A dark triad woman predaciously manipulates in an almost sadistic manner for self-gain. You see, all women are manipulative, it’s merely the efficacy of their manipulations and the agenda behind him that differs.
Dark triad traits do not benefit each sex equally. Dark triad or not, all women crave/seek a man to govern them, even if they egotistically hate the idea of being subject to, or the property of a man superior to them. Even if they fundamentally consciously hate this idea, THEY’RE STILL driven to seek a man superior to them. It’s a strong evolutionary drive. The problem is, when they find this man, the chances the relationship will work out are low, because the woman shows too much dominant behaviour and thus there’s a lack of balance in the relationship (read my piece Dominance & Submission).
So if the woman wins because she’s more dominant/dark triad, then she thinks “well this guy isn’t worthy anyway”, but then she loses, because she’s without a “worthy mate.” If she loses because he’s adept enough to handle her shit, she’s salty/bitter/hateful/resentful/scornful/a general cunt, and will actively declare war out of injured narcissistic pride. This means she is fundamentally, shitty relationship material. Only a dark triad man who likes drama (usually a high narcissist with a mother who never loved him and can be callous as fuck) is going to have any shot at some kind of (perversely) functional pairing with such a woman. 99% of men, including high quality men, will not pair with/stay with/desire a narcissistic woman romantically. Remember, sex is physical desire, not mental desire.
Dark triad or not, women are seeking commitment on the front end and men are seeking sex on the front end. These two aspects reconcile over time.
The problem with a dark triad woman is that narcissism is actually a masculinising trait, as is psychopathy as it’s not warm, which means unfeminine. So whilst these increase mating opportunities and relative attractiveness in men, they decrease attractive in women (but not mating opportunities, as women in general have no problems reproducing anyway). I’ve been meaning to write on narcissism and it’s role in attraction for awhile, but essentially, neurotypicals do not find narcissism attractive in women. The entitlement and egotism is extremely masculine. Men like submissive women. Sure, you can fake submissiveness, many intelligent women of a more masculine disposition employ this as a strategy to captivate a high value male, but you will run out of energy to sustain this as it’s very cognitively taxing, and then the ruse will be up.
The very reason you’re a nihilist is the very reason life excites me. Games are meant to be fun and you’re meant to win! What’s not to like about that? Nihilism = given to depression.
I want to make men great again. I’m not a psychopath, never claimed I was, although a lot of idiots think I am because I’m a good strategist and capable of being highly egotistical. Let me put it to you this way: it is far more effective to have empathy and be able to suspend it, than to have no empathy at all. Adaptivity is a prime asset. But when you’re in the heat of battle? That’s when the psychopath shines.
You’re very educated about human psychology, it seems, and your intuition is very impressive for a man. I find your way of thinking very close to a psychopath’s but you’re obviously not one. Psychopathy could be a philosophy too and if one were to have a functioning limbic system, that shall not be a disqualification. You sure know that, but there are many things you don’t know. There are many things I also don’t know for which I will be seeking clarification from you. For now, take my humble contribution to this great website.
As you said, women are very cunning. But you know why? Because women, on average, are more empathetic than men and score higher on EQ tests. I am not speaking from a psychopath’s point of view, I’m speaking for all the people of my gender. Women are able to read nonverbal communication with more accuracy, therefore they are able to manipulate with more efficiency. We even have a better peripheral vision!
Dark triad people (male or female) use their brains. They see people as machines with known and memorised patterns. Empathetic women use their hearts, they feel everything and act accordingly. Empathetic men whom you are trying to help, however, are stuck between their heads and their hearts. They do not feel things as empathetic women do, yet they’re too trapped in their own insecurities and fears to decode the patterns in human interactions. That is, they fail at empathising with people and understanding them intuitively and at the same time fail at objectifying and dehumanising them.
Because empathetic men are in such an unfortunate situation, empathetic women instinctively seek out a less empathetic partner; it’s very true what you said. Do people still lie to themselves and say that women don’t BEG to be dominated by a man strong enough?
We obviously agree on this, but my rationalisation is a little different from yours here. We do not do that out of masochism; women like to dominate too, in their own way. A woman likes to think she has tamed a monster with her exceptional lust-inducting seduction; it feeds her ego. And, the bigger the monster, the better. But once she has tamed the monster like a puppet and the monster is no longer scary and once she finds out which string to pull to move each part of him, she wins and gets bored and looks for a better challenge.
But if she doesn’t win, she gets salty/bitter/hateful/resentful/scornful/a general cunt, and tries yet again. But just so you know, young lads out there, she gets frustrated, but she NEVER gives up. And sooner or later the strings she is trying to pull around to test you will get tangled around her own hands and you will have gained complete control over her. Use that to your advantage! If you don’t give her the passcode, she’ll keep trying to guess and in the process of trying, she will reveal many things about herself.
The above applies for both women and men, regardless of empathy or lack thereof. Yes, men do that too–more naïvely. But since your website is meant for men and most men who do not frequent your website are ignorant about what women do and what they themselves do, I shall save explaining men to themselves for later or never.
In conlusion, we all play the same game, but differently. The most important element to the game is how challenging it is. Women like challenging and DOMINANT men, but men like challenging and SUBMISSIVE women. The key is the challenge. But sometimes the challenge is too difficult that instead of winning the challenge, the challenge wins you.
That’s what you think happens when we “run out of energy to sustain this as it’s very cognitively taxing, and then the ruse will be up.” You think we do not prepare for this beforehand? How very vulnerably male you are is very attractive (to sadistic women who would use this to destroy you). By the time we’re done luring them into our den, they would be too happy to get out. We’d leave the door open and they WON’T walk out still alive and THAT doesn’t take long.
By then, we could slowly treat them worse and worse (devalue phase, as they call it) until they get used to this treatment. Surprisingly, they think they deserve it and try to compensate and stick around more. They sadly get eaten at the end once we get bored of them. We do not or want to have a functional relationship. Do you even believe that love exists between empaths?
Love is selfish since loving another makes you feel like a good person and thus feeds your ego. That’s what Thomas Hobbes said about ‘”selfless” altruism. That’s what Mark Twain meant when he coined the term “internal master”. (Read on this, if you haven’t already).
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Narcissism is a masculine trait, but an easy one to hide. There are two types of narcissists: one so deeply insecure that he feeds off people’s attention and validation, and one who does not need to, because he seeks more noble purposes in life (be they unclear at the moment).
“99% of men, including high quality men, will not pair with/stay with/desire a narcissistic woman romantically. Remember, sex is physical desire, not mental desire.”
This quote above refers to the unintelligent narcissist. A narcissist with sheer knowledge of the human mind will not only know how to please you sexually, but will also know very well how to mess with your head real bad.
Anyway, I read “Dominance and Submission” and I completely agree with this. Striving for equality is the great bane of these generations.
Let women be women and men be men. That’s what I am going to temporarily conclude this with.
-Emily
P.S. I’ll be looking forward to collaborating with you, since I’m a strong advocate of the same ideas you believe in and since you’re exactly the type of person I’d be interested to simultaneously help and exploit (just joking). Good job structuring your articles in lists, making them very clear and concise.
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I wrote about my question in post scriptum, because my knowledge about manipulation surpasses my introscpection skills:
So, your purpose of making men (OTHER men) great again is exactly what I meant when I wrote that empaths’ compassion (real or imagined) for others is what motivates them. You probably want others to see you as great and you want to see yourself as great for helping others. I already see myself as great and do not care if others don’t. It is hard wired into my brain and helping others does not make my little amygdala drown in happy hormones like yours does.
I think you will never see everything from my point of view, though you’re almost there. You have given me a better perspective of The Game and reminded me that games should fun, therefore you shall be rewarded tremendously.
Should you need any help, you have my email. Keep your inner psychopath at peace!
“But if she doesn’t win, she gets salty/bitter/hateful/resentful/scornful/a general cunt, and tries yet again.”
That is the exact point I eject, she has outed her true self. Why the f would I want a woman like that around me? This is where women shoot themselves in the foot, or maybe, her being dumped lets her move onto the next guy and effectively be a slut.
Pre-birth control she’d be pregnant by this stage.
“By then, we could slowly treat them worse and worse (devalue phase, as they call it) until they get used to this treatment. Surprisingly, they think they deserve it and try to compensate and stick around more.”
Pre-birth control, she’d be pregnant or possibly even given birth by this stage.
The men that get trapped in the forever falling devalue phase are mentally weak, big turnoff to women, so she loses attraction to him and moves on or cucks him, again, great excuse to be a slut.
Psychopath = r selected.
“I already see myself as great and do not care if others don’t. It is hard wired into my brain and helping others does not make my little amygdala drown in happy hormones like yours does.”
Helping others perpetuates civilization, probably how this happiness evolved. Psychopaths are destructive to others including their own offspring with their selfish r selected behaviour.
This is one of your – firstclass – blogposts (beside “The Lost Sons” & “Monk Mode”) i reread once in a while. It hurts everytime but imo THIS is the only way to improve. Keep your good work up!
Damn. I would love to know you in real life dude. I know so few people that I can really get down with, that share this attitude. I’m a little bit less comfortable talking about the “losers,” mostly because I don’t actually know or interact with that many. And some of them are people that I love. 🙂
There are no words to express the honest heartfelt gratitude for what you do for all of us “intel” male and female alike. Interesting in that for eons men and woman have never lived as long as they do know. Throw in a bit of feminist ideology and watch the shinny penny (TV) and now the internet, and all around we all get to be a part of and watch the social engineered programed experiment on the “buying herd” take place. Sort of a new reality TV real life paradigm, no doubt with dire consequences to all. It’s actually very sad. Your words are a beacon for all “mankind.” And now for a stroke. Your philosophical TRP legacy
will shine for eternity.
Last how do I get an icon picture to post to my reply ?
Hey man, my story has been almost the opposite of this. I used to be a winner, very productive and hard working. But being a nerd I didn’t develop good social skills and didn’t have much fun in life. As a result I got depressed and developed a “what’s the point” mindset. My main bad hobby is spacing out or more precisely inability to concentrate because of a monotonous life. Any suggestions for someone like me?
A (noble) higher purpose often serves as a supercharger in the car that is your life – many people I’ve seen have truly accelerated themselves by aligning their activities with some sort of end goal; whether it be the safety & freedom of their family (both my granddad’s came from nothing and worked bloody hard to provide for their families)
Losers will really rip into the idea that you’re aiming for a higher purpose, most (if not all) are a bunch of vapid nihilists who have nothing going for them
Great article, keep up the good work (if the articles are anything to go by, the book’s gonna be fantastic)
What are your thoughts on being a generalist vs being an expert at something in business?
I myself am an entrepreneur and have had to juggle multiple tasks and learn different skills to run my ecommerce business. Eg. Marketing, accounting, coding, logistics etc.
I’m good enough at these tasks to get them done but am not a master in these individual fields.
You wrote “Losers prefer to do a lot of mediocre things and call it success, rather than do one thing really well and become an expert at it.”
I think some goals demand you are more of a generalist. Or is my “one thing” business? (Which is really broad)
I feel that if I focused on just one skill then I could use that as an employee somewhere but it wouldn’t be helping my business grown.
What would you recommend to someone in my situation?
Managers and Entrepreneurs are by default generalists.
You cannot manage other people if you aren’t. And there’s no way you can be expert at everything. I think IM was speaking more about those who spend their time taking interest in everything and doing nothing, rather than actual entrepreneurs and businessmen who get shit done.
Like where the hell have I been I’m coming across this blog towards the end of 2018? I was here for a single article and now it’s been two hours. I’m currently at this state your describing here. Not a loser but I have invested in myself greatly and especially this year with lots of nonfiction books (actually read a book every week through out the year) and the awakening is amazing. No longer afraid and I’m confident and brave as a lion fam. This came after a long time of victimizimg myself and having the entitlement attitude. Thank you man for your work.
Men thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Due to different circumstances, my next 3 months will define many things in my life. I am in the most demanding moments of my life in terms of time and responsibilities. If I can dedicate myself 110% to doing the things I have to do, I will have a live game changer. So I will write to you in 3 – 4 more months, telling you how I was able to achieve the greatest thing in my life, putting everything aside to accomplish what I have to do now. I have one shot.
“You can’t focus on others when you need to build yourself up”
Regards from Chile,
Daniel, 26 years.
God speed to you Daniel!
Be brave be bold,
fortune favors both!
We’ll look for your
positive follow up💪💪
Politely, it’s “Champing at the bit” not “chomping at the bit”. Otherwise, content is gold. And Kenneth in the comments is on fire!